Why are my parents suffocating their adult daughter?

I am 25 married with a 2 year old I have my own house my parents expect me to tell them everything like if I go out to a bar they get mad tell me u have baby u dont go out or if I am on the phone who u talking to they are so in my buisness And I tell...

them mind there buisness they get mad I cant win I dont even live with them now there trying tell me how raise my daughter how do I get them to stop they do a lot for me so I dont want to make em mad but its like I got answer to them when I should only have to answer to my husband

Dear njb1982,
You are right...you shouldn't answer to them. As a mature adult it is your duty to express your opinion to them. So they get mad, This only shows that you are afraid of their reactions and they use this as their tool. It is time for you to set down some rules for yourself. I will not tell them if I've been to the bar, I will not tell them that I over indulged on pizza...etc. You get my point. Take charge of yourself and refuse to discus what does not concern them. If they ask prying questions such as what did you do last night simply say we spent the evening in bed do you want the details? I'm sure it won't take long before they stop asking. If they try to parent your children you simply say this isn't the way we do things and if you continue we won't be visiting. These are bad things to say or do these are ways to gain control over your life. Your husband and your children are now priority and you must do all you can to make sure they are.
Sue...good luck

well next time they do that tell them to bud out. let them know your thankful for always helping u out and being there for u when they have been but your an adult now and they need 2 see as well as respect that and the choices u make. tell them when u want their opinion on something like taking care of your daughter u'll go to them, but other then that they need 2 respect your privacy and stay at a distance as far as getting into every little aspect of your life is concerned and leave well enough alone when u go out I dont know the circumstances here but I assume your not leaving your child abandoned by herself at the house every single night to go party so they shouldnt have a reason to be upset with u and dictate.

Is it possible they would like to see you being more responsible with a little one at home, looking after your (and their grandaughters) best interests because they Love you guys...

Awww...they just love you and your daughter, and they're concerned for you as most parents are about their children. That love and concern doesn't stop when a child grows up and you and your husband will find that out with your own daughter.

I know it's irritating to you, but I sincerely think mom and dad have your best interests at heart. You will always be their little girl just as your own daughter will be to you.

Good luck to ya!

Actually, Sue is correct. You really are under no obligation to answer to them. You're of age, you're married, and you're a parent yourself. You don't have to tell them you went out to a bar, and I love Sue's suggestion about telling them you spent the night in bed and asking them if they want details. :-)

I think Sue's answer is one of the best.