Married but feeling desire for someone else - emotional affair

Here#039;s a little background info: I am 28 my husband is 30. We have been together since we were 14 and 16. We were each others first loves and first sexual experiences. I have been faithful to him since the very first day we met, and I assume he...

has, he has given me no reason to think otherwise. We have a good marriage. We get along with each other and still enjoy each others company, but there is no quot;sparkquot;, no excitement, or energy. Our sex life is blah to me. I#039;ve never experienced anyone else sexually so I don#039;t have anyone to compare him too, but I think sex is supposed to be better than this. For years I#039;ve gotten used to just having 5-minute sex with him. It#039;s terrible. Just recently he#039;s gotten better sexually (lasting longer) but now he just goes quot;softquot; in the middle of intercourse. I#039;m so very frustrated. I have a VERY high sex drive - could do it 5 days a week very easily. He on the other hand could do it maybe 3 or 4 times a month!!! I just cannot view him as a quot;manquot; with the sexual issues he has. I am approached by men (and women too although not sexually) EVERYDAY, several times a day and told how beautiful I am (I look like Alicia Keys twin sister - mixed white and puerto rican). There is a guy I want, I am attracted to him, but nothing has happened except for flirting. He wants me BAD but respects the fact that I#039;m married. I can#039;t get him out of my mind. What should I do. I don#039;t want to end my marriage, but I don#039;t want to stay in it. I#039;m thinking of going through a separation with my husband to sort some things out. PLEASE HELP!

Before you do anything, ask yourself this:

Is it worth throwing away your marriage to satisfy your sexual urges?

I think the better option is to first discuss the situation with your husband. Tell him how you feel. Be open and honest. An affair won#039;t solve anything.

It sounds like your husband experiences some kind of sexual dysfunction. I would suggest you take him to a doctor and perhaps this could be resolved that way.

I wish you the best!

I am 35 and have been married for 13 years. My wife thinks that sex once a month is a great sex life. I have thought about cheating many times but it all boils down to the fact that I love her and my kids way to much to put them before my sexual needs. Does your husband exercise at all? That is the best thing for sexual dysfunction and sex drive. Get him out running, playing racket ball or to the skate park 5 times a week and his drive and unit will go up. Also take the drivers set when you have sex. If you were to take charge of the foreplay and intercourse I bet he would totally follow.

U have a man that loves and espects u. Don#039;t leave him jus because he has this problem for a fling wit someone who isnt as comitted. Its like throwing away a dollar for a penny bcuz the dollar had a little tear. Help him with it. Look for ways to make him want sex more. Get him some of those new pills out lol that increase sex drive. Watch erotic videos together. Go to dinner romance him if u want him. This is the father of ur kids and the man u love. Love him.

you need to communicate with your man and tell him that you have been patient but he needs to do more. If he cares for you he win make things work. Be a team and he will not always be able to mind read that 4 times is not enough for you. Stick a vibrator up his ass for fun!

Talk to him..tell him what you need and that he needs to work on this too.. Otherwise it's going to ruin your marriage.. Communication needs to be happening on both ends Him and you! If you dont have that? how can you ever get anywhere?

No one falls in love by choice,

it is by CHANCE.
No one stays in love by chance,
it is by WORK.
And no one falls out of love by chance,
it is by CHOICE

Just talking about the sexual dysfunction side of things. As a man, I find that the less I'm turned on by my partner the easier it is to last and if I'm really really enjoying her, thinking how lucky I am, she's the most beautiful creature etc.. it becomes utterly impossible for me to last. It seems to me that the highly sought after skill of control in a man is at the opposite end of the spectrum as passion.

A man can improve, gain experience and techniques but as far I can tell experience means losing his sex drive and techniques most often means thinking about anything apart from how much he loves and enjoys his partner. If he really CAN'T last I'd tentatively take that as confirmation of how beautiful he (agreeing with all those others) thinks you are.

As for the going soft bit, that too is natural (after climax). Some may be able to go a few more times without a break but if not he's just a normal man and women should really stop belittling men for the way our bodies are designed to be. It wouldn't be fair for us to insist that women should be satisfied in 5 minutes because we know that on the whole it isn't natural for them. Men should do their very best if they care for their partner but their women should never assume that the unnatural is possible or right.