Me and my girlfriend have been talkin' about stepping it up to 3rd base. (basically oral sex) and I asked her what she thought about going to 3rd base and if she didn't want to it was totally cool, nothing in our relationship would change, I didn't want to pressure her at all or force her. But then she replied back saying she isn't into the whole "bases" thing, that she's more of the "go with the flow" type of girl, and whatever happens, happens :].
What does this mean? She doesn't want to do this? or she'd rather it happen on it's own rather than plan it?
Both of those answers are good, when I first started "going to third base" it was a confusing and sometimes scary experience just because I didn't know what to expect. My girlfriend at the time was the same way, a kind of lets just go with the flow type of girl. Eventually one evening when we were making out and messing around she kind of just took charge and went down on me, it did however take some time after before she would allow me to perform oral on her because she wasn't comfortable with it. Though in time she came around and eventually we gave each other our virginity. We were together for around two years all together, definitely fell in the high school sweethearts category and to this day we are still friends though both of us have moved on. Basically what I'm saying is as long as you let her take her time and talk to her, though not pressuring her she will become more comfortable and it will also help to bring you closer to each other.
I think that she means to let it happen on it's own. Sometimes planning things like when to have sex or when to do oral can be akward, and people can feel pressured by that too, even if reassured or even if they agreed to it beforehand. So I don't think she's saying 'no', but if things go that way, and if everything feels right, just let it happen :) It feels much more natural and un-rushed, and, well... right.
Though the best answer you could get would come from her though, so I suggest you ask what she means, but make sure you reassure her that you're only asking because you honestly didn't know what she meant, not that you're wondering when. Girls can be wierd, and she could easily take your asking her about this the wrong way, and mistake it for pressuring her.
Plans to go into new bases scared the crap out me when I was living that hehe Yeah, she meant that she'd rather it happen on it's own. When you plan things like that the moment can get too tensed and may be ruinned (sorry, cant spell that) Just let go yourselves when having a great time and kissing, or while being alone. If it has to happen it will. Have fun!
