Teenagers wanting to get pregnant

I've been on this site for a while, and sometimes I feel like a broken record. It really breaks my heart to see girls every day ages 14-17 asking how to have a baby, how to trick their boyfriends into have a baby, or saying they want to get pregnant.
I...

tell them how it is, I try and explain how hard raising a child is, the financial burden you go through, the level of maturity it takes to handle a baby, the selflessness it takes. It amazes me though, how they get mad, when you are just giving them advice and your own life experience.
Everything I say to them is not to be mean in any way, it's to try and educate them, to help them, and to show them they are making a huge mistake. I'm not saying anything bad about teen moms, accidents happen, and I think they are strong women to keep the child and raise them. There are some great teen mom's out there. What bother's me is the one's trying to have a child.
I'm 23 years old I have a 3 month old son and I try to give them my perspective on things. It's not easy. I've been called names, told I'm not a good mother, told that I can't care for my child, told that I'm not married so I dont matter, all by these young girls on here.
It amazes me how immature they sound, yet the think they can handle a child.
I understand that they think they want a baby, but wanting one and needing one are two different things. Am I right?

I'm 17 and I have a 14 month old. I was 15 when I had her.. I didnt plan it. but I was willing to make somehting positve of it. but then my boyfriend of over a year cheated on my when I was 4 months pregnant. and my doctor told my I was starving myself to keep my little girl figure and I had stress test twice a week. and I didnt have anyone but my nest friend to get me thru it. it sucked. she is beautiful. and everything happens for a reason. but I miss not having a resposibility. be a teen while you can. cause you will eventually have to go grow up. dont do it unless you have to. be smart when having sex. cause the guy most likely wont be there for u. and it's hard being a single mom that works and goes to school.! and it's stressfel. wait to have a baby! you won't regret it. and your baby will have a better life

Yes you are right! It all boils down to being inmature.

I KNOW RIGHT!
ITS AWFUL ... WHY?... IM 14 AND I DONT WANT KIDS UNTILL IM AT LEAST 20 AND THATS EVEN IF I EVER WANT KIDS!

It's nice to actually hear a younger person agree with me hannahbanana. That rarely happen on here lately.

lacrissadawn
Thank you for that. It's nice to hear from a teen mom about the subject. By the way congratulations and I think your amazing for doing what you have done.

That's the problem with a lot of teens. I'm not saying all of them, I'm saying a majority. They want a baby for all the wrong reason's. Too keep their boyfriends. Too have someone who love them unconditionaly. To repair their broken homes. To get their exboyfriends back. It's really sad.
I know the thought crossed my mind when I was younger, but it was never more than just a thought. I had more sense than to bring a baby into the world that I could not myself provide for mentally and emotionally.

I agree with you, on every one of those questions you go through the list of things they will never be able to do, and to them you're just picking on them. It's not picking it's reality. The reality is that if a teen has a baby she will have a harder life, yeah some of them can make it and become great parents but others leave their babies for their parents to raise. Not only is this not fair to the teens parents but it's also not fair to the baby. A baby needs a stable environment to be raised in, normally a teenager can't do that.

I'm a mother of 3, I had my oldest when I was 25. There were times when I didn't think I would be able to do it. I am married and I still have the full support of my parents and to this day I still need help. Having children is not a game or competition and I feel that a lot of them think it is.

To be honest, they're going to think what they want, how they want to, and when they want to and there's not a lot any of us can say about it. If we change just one girls mind then it's worth it.

colethky
Exactly. It's really sad to see this whole teen pregnancy trend going around. They have no clue what their getting themselves into.
They think were all being mean when were not. I know there's nothing we can say, it's just so hard to keep calm when you know their making a mistake.

wow I totally see that too now days!!!
I help my mom with my 3 year old brother
and man he's a mess! I mean I love him to peices
but thats a lot of work! I think these girls
need to take care of a baby..or babysittin
to actually know what is the (atleast) 25% of the resonsibility..
and be aware that once they have the kid its going to be
a 24/7 thing!!!

I wouldnt changhe having a baby. because I have to be responsible for my actions. and I wouldnt change being a mother to little girl. but thinking back... I had it made. I had no worries. but I didnt't get to live out my teeneage years. I can't go out with my friends. I do becasue they all love my daughter and they know that its not just me anymore.
And as fas as having a baby to love u. that baby needs love too. and you have to love urself before you can love anyone else!!
and having a baby so your guy will stay. my boyfriend was never gone. we were best friends and I didnt know anything was wrong. so if he won't stay with you now. having a baby isn't going to change that. guys know that you don't have to be together to have a baby.
if it wasn't for havinh my child I wouldv'e married that guy and had three kids and a house and a whole life with him...then he would cheat on me and it would've been worse.
having this baby brought out her fathers true colors. and I'm thankful that I wasn't married and had more kids with him to put thru a divorce. I'm with someone right now that loves me and my daughter more than anything. he misses her when he doesn't see her.
He might not be her dad. but anyone can be a dad. but it takes a real guy to be a father. and he is basically her father figure.

lacrissadawn
Thanks for sharing that. I wish more teens would actually listen to other teen mom's out there.

I agree that these young girls need to wake up and realize that having a baby is very very hard and a very big responsibility. Im 22 and I have a 1 year old she is adorable and very very hard work, me and her dad is still together thank God but between the both of us we are still struggling to take care of her financialy. So I hear what you mean and I think that you are 100% right! Congrats on the new baby also!

I'm 16. I love kids. I can't wait to have them. But that's another reason to wait in my opinion. I want to be able to give them the best life I can. That means a stable family. I can't acheive this at my age. I can't support myself yet. I want to live my life. Not ruin it. And I'm happy that you tell these girls that it's not as pretty as they expect. I hope that if we can get so many girls not to be so niave then we can save a baby from growing up in a unhappy childhood.

Im almost sixteen, still a virgin probably one of the few left in my school.
I agree more than anything. both of my sisters barely tuned 19 this year and both have 2 kids ages from 3months-3years(I love my niece and nephews though..). They didn't even have enough time to grow up. I know a lot of girls at my school who are pregnant or trying too. They should of waited and if they really wanted to be a mother..be a good one, dont have a job get a carrer. you know? its outrageous its like the new trend...
I hope you are doing well, good luck and I bet you are a good mother

I know how you feel im 5teen and im having a baby it was a mistake I didnt want this t o happend I lost my v card to him an we been going together for 3 years
I know how it is to take care of a baby because I take of my niece an it very hard I don't know why these girls trying to have a baby it really hard and they costs to much and I thank you for your adive

well you gave me some harsh advice. but you have experienced it. I REALLY want one but it wont do anything but hurt me. I used to not want one but now I do. But its in my mind. if I did get pregnant I wouldnt like it at 15. but if it ever is to happen me and my boyfriend will give our baby 110%. we wont just leave the baby with his mom and go out. if we go out the baby will go with us. bc it was our mistake. I hate people that do that! but thanks for the advice. I agree with you.

im 13 and I wouldnt have a baby untill in my 20's but try saying that to england

-We have the highest teen pregnacy rate in over 20 years and the highest in europe .. how true that is im not sure
-And it has emerged in the papers that a 13year old boy is now a dad and tbh he looks about 8 years old

Read the story
http://www.thesun.co.uk/sol/homepage/news/article2233878.ece
but they dont want to listen untill they accually see untill they have a baby

xx

I totally agree with you.

I know it is soo sad I see so many teen moms and I fell really bad for the babies everychild should have a mommy and a daddy that are commitited to each other so they can be raised in a staedy envoirment and after getting a puppy and having the whole responsability for it I dont want a child for a long time