I just want to be happy for once!!

So, I moved to Washington about 12 months ago, I thought I was finally getting a break in life, I was happy, I had a lot of friends, I never herd a rumor about me, I was happy and depressed simultaneously. The thing is, is when I was at school I was the...

happiest kiddo alive (I know your thinking whats the problem then?!) But when I would go home I would just feel like I was sh*t, worthless, a waste because everyone in that house (My mother, my step-dad whom I call the STD, and my big sister) told me I was,but not in actual words. So after 10 monthes of living there I fell in love blah blah didn't work out cause my mom tore us apart (everything happens for a reason) So after we broke up my mom never trusted me alone with my friends so I was always at my own house, and people in the house would not shut up about things I'm always doing wrong!!! So they put me on meds, turns out the meds were making me suicidal and I tried to commit suicide (swallowing a whole bottle of medication) My aunty found me and took me to the hospital and after I was saved (stomach pumped, drank tarr,I.v sheeut) things stared to get normal again, my mom gave me back alll my privileges (a phone,going to friends house,dating,going to the mall ect.) and to celebrate I had one of my friends come over and then after she spent the night we went to go spend the night at her house, and my mom randomly showed up on her door step and told me she had a surprise for me and that I needed to come with her (I HAD A TERRIBLE FEELING) she asked me to get in the car and I asked why we just took the seatac exit...She said she bought me a plane ticket to visit my real dad whom I had just moved from in hawaii. I was exited until I got to hawaii and my dad told me I was never able to go home to my mom...She tricked me. So now I here in the place that makes me miserable...I ABSOLUTELY HATE THIS ISLAND!!! Soo...any suggestions to maintain my sanity?!.

First off I am so sorry. What your mom did; horrible. And im kind of in the same boat. Just try to get through. Thats all I can really tell you. I mean I dont know what to do either. But everything happens for a reason, right? Maybe things will work out for the better. you just got to give it time, and try to make it the best you can. Instead of sitting around the house mopping, try smiling FOR NO REASON. I have no clue. But I promise you, you'll be okay. I have no clue how old are you, but im guessing at-leas 15? Not that much longer till college. And im probably not giving you the answer you want. But Just try to make something bad into something good :]

think of it as a new start, a chance to get away from the mental abuse you had to go through. what your mum did was awfull, but try and look at it as a chance to meet new frends, get a boyfrend, go out and have fun without your mother looking over your shoulder at everything you do. and as canofsoda said, soon youll be off to college. your dad will probably let you have a better life than your mom, so rather there than back home with and overcontrolling mentally abusive mum right? I know this might not help but good luck and remember theyre people in this world who love you dont give up xxx