How to start essays?

How do I start an essay about my self with out My name is? I have to write an essay and I want it to be creative and I have a few Ideas but what do you people think?

On the day of my birth, the second of the month of February, in the year of our Lord one thousand, nine hundred, and ninety three, my father did look down at my newborn visage, clutched his fist, and thundered at the storm-tossed heavens, I NAME YOU NATE!

I was given the name (name) by (parent 1 2) on (date), when I was born.
*Shrug*

'The first thing you should know about me is that I find it hard to start essays!'

Hmm how about commencing your essay with:

Looking over the rims of my glasses, I ... (insert whatever you need and continue from there).

Ok this next idea is a rip off from my baby brother who is still in high school...He wrote an essay about himself as a house-hold furniture...Basically he described his surrounding and where he was living as if he was a piece of furniture...He got pretty good marks for creativity.

I think you could ask a few questions and answer them yourself, or call on a few people for their answer