Should I stop being friends with her???

OK I have already started college and it’s my third week here. It was hard trying to find friends to sit with at lunch and dinner or when we have events such as convocation. I met this girl at my dorm hall and her roomate they both seemed pretty cool soon after we have gotten to met another girl whom she had known longer. She seemed really cool and I could see us being friends in the long run. Soon after it was the four of us but I soon found out that she had only started to laugh and had conversations with the other two girls’ and normally I was the one who was left out on whatever conversations that we had. But today seemed like an okay day like any other same old same old. She had donated some blood and I asked her a simple question “Did it hurt” and she replied “Well it hurts more to look at your face, but yeah it did hurt”. This is not the first time that she had said something sarcastic but seriously…this is not highschool anymore and taking the time out to say something really stupid and shows that you are still in that immature mindset. But it really hurt me to say that and she did even say that she was joking at all. And I’m like how dumb. But I’m contemplating on whether Is should drop her or not. And I’m leaning towards dropping her completely. You might say “oh get over it” but there is just so much that I can take. She assumes that I’m racist. Because when we were walking towards our dorms there were two Asians who had Bath and Body Works bags and Forever 21 bags and I said “Asians obviously…” and she said OUT LOUD “what did you say” and I said “nothing” and she said “No, you said Asians obviously…”. I am not racist at all but she assumes so. She doesn’t even have a clue that I love Asian Culture or that I listen to Japanese and Korean music. (She’s Philipino). So inside I was deeply hurt when she called me a racist or prejudice because I am not. She hit me with her arm when she was walking and didn’t even say sorry so she walked to her dorm and her friend waited for her while she was talking on the phone. So I kept walking to my dorm and here I am typing this. This may seem like a long story but I seriously need some advice, and start to have even better friends.

Answer #1

The “asians obviously” comment most likely sounded more like a racist comment to her and that may be where your problem started. I mean seriously think about what you said. Then you complain that she is prejudging you? What you said does sound racist even if it was not ment to be. Too be honest with you I am suprised all she did was bump your arm after that comment.

My advice is to talk one on one with her alone. Apologize big time for the comment you made because even if you don’t think you said something wrong, you did. Try to talk to her about the way you treat each other and the things you say to one another. I am sure you guys can work out your differances to where you can at least be polite when in the same social situations.

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