Should I see my dad when he gets out of jail?

My dad is in jail and he says that he has changed into a different person, he told my grandma, and I don't know if I should believe him or not. He sexually abused my sister and when he was probably about to start with me, she told so I wouldn't have to go through what she did. When he gets out which I will be able to make my own decisions should I see him or try to avoid him? I am kind of curious because he is my dad, but I don't want to make my mom and sister upset. So here are my questions: when he gets out, which I which I will be able to make my own decisions, should I see him or try to avoid him? 2. Should I believe it when he says he is a changed man? Now he is a preacher at his jail, but my mother said they can change, but once they get out of jail they change back into what they were before thet went to jail.

Dear jjcrzy18,
If you do start seeing your father it must be in the company of others. You must never be alone with him. When it comes to this type of behaviour your father was sent to jail for he needs life long counselling. This is not something that can be cured or disappears with the help of a preacher. It is a dysfunction that needs to be controlled the rest of his life. So unless he is in counselling then he will not be any different and even in counselling his preferences will not change. Supervised visits with him is a must, he must never be alone with children EVER. You also need to seek out counselling to help cope and to be informed of the precautions you need to take and how to move on with your life. Your whole family is in need of counselling. This is not something that gets better or changes...but it's how you deal with it that changes.
Sue...good luck

you must not have understood. he is a preacher, not getting help from a preacher. and by the time I see him I will probably be like 17 or 18. so I wouldn't be a child then. do you think I should talk ot him or avoid him when I get out?

theres only 1 person who can answer that questions 'should I see him or not?' and thats YOU, what your farther did is wrong yes, an seeing your father may cause other problems with your mum and sister, but if you do want to see him, and see if he has changed, then maybe you should.Atleast you gave him the chance to se if ha has changed, and if he turns back to what he was before he went to jail, then atleast you can say you tried, and gave him that chance. I hope you make the right decision good luck xx

thanks for the advice!

well.. my fatherr wuss iin jaiil t00 f0r rape. && he alwayss saiid sumthiingg liikee he w0uldd kill sum0nee anytiimee he g0t 0utta jaiil. andd anytiimee he diid... he w0uld b thee samee 0ld daddy t0 mehh.. buhh ii w0uld never want to b ar0undd hiim, andd he w0uld alwayss get madd f0r n0t beiingg ablee t0 kill sum0nee riight afterr he g0t out.
well... he killedd hiimself becuss he diid'nt havee a chancee t0 kill any0nee elsee.

t0 me.. ii thiink theyy never changee.