How can i cope with my mother's death without failing?

My mom died in July, it was horrible she had MS and was on the end stages so she was DNR but her nursing home didn't let her die peacefully in her sleep they brought her back again and she ended up in hospital on 100% oxygen all day till midnight while...

we were being ignored and shoved into a corner until midnight when she died and now I can't stop thinking about it it's affecting all of my coursework at college I think I'm going to fail this year and I don't know what to do about it I can't do councilling I just clam up

Dont say this wordsI hate My Life.
Its not the all pain you can feel in this life.I think to lose all your parents and friends is more painful.
This life can make us be fine and it also can make as cry and die.There's what LIFE.
Be strong,and please dont say that words again,'cause this life is one for us and we going to live it as best we can.

I think you need to take time out to grieve for your mother. If you think you can't cope with college at the moment, defer the semester for later. Spend time with your family to grieve, they need you as much as you need them to cope through this.

If your mother was under a Do Not Resuscitate option, you can complain to the nursing home management about it, even take it to court if you want, but your mother's passed, and she probably wouldn't want the family to be distressing themselves about things like this, she would probably want your hurt and loss to be short-lived.

Thank-you. You made me cry but thank-you. I cant take time out theres not enough of it

I don't really know what to say about the way your Mother was cared for in her final days, but what I can say is that she is watching over you...she wants you to do your very best, she understands that you are upset about loosing her and all that went on, but she is free from the things we experience in our lives, like pain and suffering...your Mom is urging you from the other side to be the best you can be, make this your incentive to succeed...it's what she would want.

I am so sorry for your loss - Hope this helps you: http://www.helpguide.org/mental/grief_loss.htm - you'll be in my thoughts and prayers.

Oh honey...I'm so very sorry...Losing our mothers isn't easy at any age, and you have lost yours very young. I know you said no counseling...but have you thought of a bereavement group? Everyone there is trying to cope with a great loss...these groups aren't moderated by counselors, per se...they are moderated by Hospice workers (a registered nurse, who is well versed in the care of dying people, as well as the care of the people who grieve them).

I can feel your pain in your words...a bereavement group will not only help you, but I think you'll surprise yourself in how much you might help someone else. It's not religious, but I would call it spiritual...please think about it...All you have to do is call a local Hospice office, and they will direct you...

(((Big Hugs)))...

phrannie

oh I'm so sorry. I don't know how you should deal with it unless you go to a counselor and even if you clam up just tell yourself that they are there to help you. I can guarentee that you will make the best of what you've got. I mean you still have your dad and any siblings, just think that your mom is with you because she is, she watches over you everyday and when you fall down all you have to do is say a prayer to your mom. she will be listening and doing her best for you. I can guarentee that if you try and ask for her moral support that she will be there to help you through it all. as for the whole failing college thing just try not to let your mind wander to your mom and when you think that your going to just say that you can do it. your mom is now your offical gaurdian angel. if you say that she is with you and you feel her with you then she will be. you will be srong and feel the love spread over you. just try and tell yourself that you are in her loving care. my mo told me this once, while mothers here your safe and sound but when she's gone up from this ground listen, look, and give her your ear cause your mama's baby forever and ever. when I say this to myself at school getting ready for a test I feel my mom there with me. and just remember, even though your mom's not here on earth she will always be with you in your heart. and she will always love you no matter what happens. LOVE ALWAYS

I'm praying for you.
If you ever need to talk to anyone... just funmail me
talking always gets my mind off of my problems.

You're in my prayers...
Everything will be okay.. Just give it time... and not doing this semester might be the best for you.
Just put everything in God's hands..

I think when a person dies of some thing as bad as ms they would prefer to rest in piece than be alive and in pain, I just lost my nan yesterday morning and she died of cancer, the way m helping myself to gt thru it is to remember how much pain she was in before she passed and how much she wanted to be relieved, I think as long as you spent all the time you could with her and you were there for her when she needed you the most!! about you failng I think f you just try and concentrate you will be fine, you need to focus on urelf for a bit now that your mums in a better place! I hope my advice helps you I feel for you x

my mother has also got cancer. I do not know how to cope im 18 and I will also have the responsibility of looking afta 4 siblings, who are younger than me. I do not know how to break the news to them. that mother is going to die soon.
whay shall I do. help me please