Do we send our daughter a birthday present?

I did not approve of my daughter marrying a man 13yrs older than her ... she was only 19 and he in his 30's. Since she married him she told me It's her life and to stay out of it! she continues to send letters and call me just to tell me to Stay out...

of her life the truth is I was a single mother and loved every minute of it but she has always wanted her daddy ... he's never pursued a relationship with her and she blames me. Her birthday is right around the corner ... I so badly want all this madness to end, celebrate her birthday with her ... and to tell her how much I love her but everytime I try she ends up hating me even more. What do I do?

I think you should send her a letter for her birthday.
you need to tell her that you are willing to aacept her husband.
you may not understand it, but she does.
she just wants you to be there for her in the end, and not try to change her mind about him. I tghink you should just acept him, if you want to have a relationship wtih her.

Keep trying - you're family - never give up - she's always be regardless, you're little girl in this life...I wish you the best !!

You have to do something - there is nothing more crushing than if you think your parents have 'forgotten' you or don't love you. She's 19, come on - of course she's going to behave like this but when she gets to about 24/25 and matures you'll be glad you persisted. My oldest sister is a pain and used to treat us pretty bad growing up. I persisted and we now have a pretty good relationship. Don't try 'too' hard though, like getting in her face and hassling her caus she'll end up blowing up and getting mad.

Send her that birthday gift, and keep sending them until she starts to see things different. The worst thing you can do is give up on her. With persistence, you may just be able to break through her wall, but don't try to force the issue...just send your love and gifts with no strings attached...let her make the decision to finally let you in.

It's called tough love, and it really is tough...

dont go and when shes all sad that her mom didnt go then she'll miss you and think you dont want to be in her life so she'll want to be in yours so just ignore it and dont think about it cause your her mom and probly the best thing thats ever happend to her so just let her come to you...
im only 13 and dont know very much so thins probly didnt help...sorry...

hmm, send her a prezzie, and a card, but write your feeling in the card, tell her that no matter what she does or says you will still love her, that you are ready to accept her husband as part of the family and that you just want your daughter back...

keep trying...
send her a card and keep telling her you love her! Dont push any issues except just tell her you are there for her and love her...Believe me, I know..its tough...

Maybe you need to hang off till after her Birthday. Send her a gift and tell her how much you love her and how you want things to change between you. It would have been easier had you not criticised her choice of partner - that must rankle with her - especially if you indicated that she was searching for a father figure. She is still in contact with you and even though you say it's too 'tell you to stay out of her life' there must be more to it than that. If there wasn't she could just ignore you. So part of her wants it to be better too. I just wouldn't choose a big occasion. Choose something you know she will really appreciate. And maybe put a white flag on a stick in with it??