Am i turning athiest??

omg helpp... ok well ivebeen a christian for about 3 years and I've been waiting a long time to feel god but im starting to give up,I mean,when you find god theres supposed to be this big... presence or sumthin and im starting to think athiest thoughts I...

dont wanna think athiest thoughts I wanna go to heaven but lately I've been wondering do I even believe in heaven. god has done nothing and has had nothing to do with my life isnt that what he's supposed to do first of all I thought I just wasnt being a christian right and eventually I would get it right but NOTHING happens... I mean IF there is a heaven I wanna go but lately I've been doubting there is a heaven what happens when you die I've been starting to think you die and then thats it...darkness...nonexistance I really dont wanna be having these thoughts but help can someone just turn athiest without choice like or just happens or can I keep trying to force myself to keep trying to believe and be a christian because I dont wanna be an athiest!!!

Everyone thinks that turning you life over to Christ means that you will feel this huge and constant rush. That everyday you will, as we say in my church, soar to the rafters.
Everyone needs to remember that God is always there, just sometimes He is whispering.

Im 100% sure you were FORCED to be Christian am I right?
You were MADE to go to church therefore beliefs were FORCED on you.
You are older now have found your own beliefs.
Now its either you DO or you DONT.

Which onee is it?

Then why did you choose that?

Your choices aren't limited to just Christian or Atheist... there are plenty of other choices. Its one thing to have doubts about your beliefs... that's pretty common. But FORCING yourself to believe IS NOT believing... its DENIAL.

You should spend this time exploring your own thoughts and questions... look for answers.

See..
You really dont believe in god.
You just want him to solve your problems he hasnt so what does that prove?
That he isnt going to.

This is what happens when you have independent thought alyssa619, congratulations! if you start to examine religion you begin to realise how ridiculous it is. It's not just a little bit questionable, it's absolutely, clearly, man made rubbish. Why don't you want to be an atheist?

Sometimes it's hard to Feel God. Sometimes it's like a scar, you have it for life but you can't always feel it. Kinda like if you didn't have a scar, but it's there.
Yes, even I do question the whole Let there be life knowing that whoever wrote the bible and published it wasn't even around or there to witness or to see it happen. But if you believe in ghosts, then you know there is a god. Lost souls who never made it to heavan or hell are ghosts. Turning athiest is your decision. And if people say you can't go to heavan cause your not a part of god anymore, Don't LISTEN. Everybody is a part of god cause he put us here and he loves us all equally. It depends on how you shared love and not hate during your life and if you had accomplished one of the 7 deadly sins such as sloth without asking for forgivness is what let's you into the kindom of heavan.

I'm Atheist and everyone in the family including Irene knows it,I was forced to be Christian,every time I was depressed and still am my mom said go to church and let God handle it,I went to church and waited for something,the only thing I did was meet new friends,nothing God related. My mom DOES STILL get mad whenever I bring up Atheism,she knows what I want to believe,but can't accept me. Forcing yourself to believe is being for sure in DENIAL,I tried and tried to believe but nothing EVER happened. Plain and simple Alyssa,your becoming an Atheist.

I'm an atheist, and I feel so much better after taking control of (and responsibility for) my own life. I encourage you to ask honest questions and to seek logically sound answers. You are certainly not along in this world though, as a recent US pole found 15% of Americans don't belong to a religion. I strongly suggest picking up some books like:
The God Delusion by Richard Dawkins
Letters to a Christian Nation by Sam Harris
God is not Great by Christopher Hitchens
Breaking the Spell by Daniel Dennett

Also check out http://www.centerforinquiry.net

A natural (not supernatural) understanding of the world is both beautiful and fulfilling, and don't let anyone tell you any differently.

Were you serious about being a Christian? If you were then you would trying to know God rather than waiting to feel something. You need to know Him. You mentioned that you became a Christian for having a problem solved but after waiting for a long time that did not happen. That is the problem with many. They have some particular thing that they want from God, a particular miracle or a particular understanding, or a particular sign. When they wait and don't get what they want they decide that there us no God. When we approach a higher authority (God), it is foolishness to expect him to behave how we want him to behave.He will behave how he deems fit. We must acknowledge God's authority and understand that he answers prayer not how we want it but how He deems fit. All you have to do is to know God. You can do this by reading the Bible.When you know God your problems will vanish one by one. You need not force your self to believe when you know Him.

photos4lexy had suggested you some books. If you want to get completely deluded and lost you can read those books. Else I suggest you read only the Bible.

Ignore the various theists that are telling you it's all your fault for not being a good enough christian. That way lies ever escalating self-doubt and confusion as you try to reconcile the christian faith with everything in reality that contradicts it.

Welcome to the reality based community!

Arachnid is right to a point. Christians, well meaning as we are, tend to put blame on others who are struggling. Instead, we should be encouraging and prayerfully understanding. Also, doubt and fears and the lacking of the sense of God in your life happens to all of us. Having been a Christian now for almost 20 years I have had my fair share of doubting God's involvement in my life. Plenty of times I have thought, God where are You?, only to later realize that His silence only turned out to draw me closer to Him. The Christian life was never meant to be pain free or struggleless. It's a hard life full of many trials, set backs, disappointment and pain. So then why do it? Because in the end, for those who persevere, there is reward. Let me then encourage you to keep on keeping on. God is not about feeling, God is about relationship.

*** I dont wanna be an athiest!!!

I know it seems scary from where you sit right now, but it isn't really. But as you are experiencing, we do not choose our beliefs. The only thing you can do is inform yourself. That will guide the beliefs that get chosen for you by your subconscious.

When I lost my faith I went through a tough 2 weeks of vacillation.

I went back and forth between thinking Christianity was the most preposterous thing I ever heard of to praying as hard as I could for God to forgive me for my doubts and lack of faith.

For me anyway, reason won out over wishful thinking and I decided that there is no literal god.

Your mileage may vary.

Alyssa619 it is a very good think you’ve realized all this, this early in Christianity, some of us has spent almost half of our natural life’s on earth wasting our time praying for help and being thankful “if only, it is for the air that we breath” Take your time, read those above mentioned books or search information on it on the internet. Also Google: ex christians stories on their de-conversions, also religion delusion bubble. You would be amazed the similarity of de-converted xtians to most of your and my stories! Let life be a journey, don’t let ANYTHING keep you back!

Eternallife: ***photos4lexy had suggested you some books. If you want to get completely deluded and lost you can read those books. Else I suggest you read only the Bible.***

Do you really THINK Alyssa619 or any other atheist on this site DIDN’T READ ENOUGH of their bibles and that being the reason why that way??? You’re making a major mistake. So what are you going to do next? Slam us over the heads with your bible and hope our brains would stop working???

ake your time, read those above mentioned books or search information on it on the internet. Also Google: ex christians stories on their de-conversions, also religion delusion bubble.

Good point. http://unreasonablefaith.com/ is a very good example of this.

Do you believe that Jesus died so that you can live eternally with Him in heaven one day? I believe you do otherwise you wouldn't be concerned about going to heaven or not.
Don't despair. This will not be the first time you will have doubts. I have had my share as well and even stopped believing for a number of years. What I do remember most about those years is the feeling of helplessness and depression. Since putting my trust in God again I feel much lighter and fulfilled. I hope you find this as well.

*** What I do remember most about those years is the feeling of helplessness and depression.***

Preachhislove, if you felt helpless and depressed, it only means you live in denial, told yourself you didn’t believe, but deep down you were still scared ending up in HELL or not going to HEAVEN!

Having a nice neutral outlook on life or religion doesn’t necessary bring peace in a person, it only makes you more rebellious. Having honest rational answers to most or all your questions, bring peace of mind. Only my opinion :-)

**No. I know that you have all read the Bible. It is just that you did not read it with an open heart***

Eternallife now you’re talking a bunch of crap again, how can I read the Bible for 38yr+ without reading it with an open heart??? I am NOT the ignorance person you would make me out for. I just came at a point in my life, when my eyes opened, like I said many times before, it is a pity it happened this late in my life!

***You did not want to know the truth when you read it.***

Give me ONE good reason why a person going through difficult TIMES in their life, WONT WANT TO KNOW THE TRUTH IN THE BIBLE, if they they opened the bible and read it by free will??? Doesn’t make sense does it!

***Ignore the various theists that are telling you it's all your fault for not being a good enough christian.***

Christians never said this. Why do you put words into our mouth? Fau I was just pointing out to you where you went wrong. We have all committed this mistake and have been where you are. But I did not take hasty decision based on the human knowledge but asked the Lord to reveal where we went wrong. Then He revealed to me my mistakes many times and thus I am now where I am. Therefore the choice is yours.

You can ignore us and read those books that are recommended in this site written by some people with an agenda. I would not say that those authors are deluded because they men who hold the truth in unrighteousness
[Rom 1:18 For the wrath of God is revealed from heaven against all ungodliness and unrighteousness of men, who hold the truth in unrighteousness;] and bring the wrath or God on yourselves

Or

You can ignore them and read the bible and accept Jesus as your savior and be saved to heaven.
[Joh 5:24 Verily, verily, I say unto you, He that heareth my word, and believeth on him that sent me, hath everlasting life, and shall not come into condemnation; but is passed from death unto life. ]

***Christians, well meaning as we are, tend to put blame on others who are struggling. Instead, we should be encouraging and prayerfully understanding. ***

I agree and we also need to point out mistakes when we see them.

***Do you really THINK Alyssa619 or any other atheist on this site DIDN’T READ ENOUGH of their bibles and that being the reason why that way??? You’re making a major mistake. So what are you going to do next? Slam us over the heads with your bible and hope our brains would stop working???***

No. I know that you have all read the Bible. It is just that you did not read it with an open heart. You did not want to know the truth when you read it. If you loved the truth you would have paid attention to these verses

Joh 1:14 And the Word was made flesh, and dwelt among us, (and we beheld his glory, the glory as of the only begotten of the Father,) full of grace and TRUTH.

Joh 1:17 For the law was given by Moses, but grace and truth came by Jesus Christ.

Joh 8:32 And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.

Joh 8:40 But now ye seek to kill me, a man that hath told you the truth, which I have heard of God:

Joh 8:45 And because I tell you the truth, ye believe me not.

Joh 14:6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

Joh 17:17 Sanctify them through thy truth: thy word is truth.

Anyone who rejects these does not want the truth.

Jane of the Jungle

***Give me ONE good reason why a person going through difficult TIMES in their life, WONT WANT TO KNOW THE TRUTH IN THE BIBLE, if they they opened the bible and read it by free will??? Doesn’t make sense does it!

The Bible was written a long time ago, and as such you have to take the historical facts and values into account when you read it. Also it is meant as a guide to Jews (the old Testament) and Christians (Old and New Testament). You know this already since you say you have been reading the bible for so many years.
What you then should know is that God has used war, famine, death and captivity numerous times to draw His people back to Him again. This might seem cruel, but if you think about it, when do you ever pray harder than when you are in pain and anxious for the Lord to help you.Do you call upon Him or praise Him enough when everything is going well and great in your life?
If you think that going through difficult TIMES isn't suppose to happen to you when you are a Christian then you should go back to the fall of man into sin. This was where we went wrong and where we ultimately brought difficult times upon ourselves.This was not in the original design that God had intended for us. Then came Jesus and He took our sins upon Himself so that we can have eternal peace with Him one day. Until then we are still bound by the earthly sins and faults, the only diffirence is that we believe in Jesus and therefore are working everyday with the knowledge that we will be going to heaven. Ultimately these difficult times serve to strenghten our hearts and make us ready to live with the Lord.
I think that you are looking for an answer to your problems instead of looking to the Lord. The Lord answers you in His own time and manner. Not when you want it, but when you need it. Reading the Bible is not the only way to communicate with God. Talking to Him trough prayer is much more rewarding.
You will only understand what the bible is telling you when you take Jesus as your saviour and subsequently receive the Holy Ghost into your Heart. He leads you to understand what the Lord wants. I also read the Bible without understanding it before I made that step.