Afraid to tell my boyfriend about being taken advantage of

I went to my boyfriends birthday party, I got really drunk to the point where I passed out. My friends told me teh next morning that I couldnt even walk or stand on my own for that matter. I wanted to go to sleep.. so I was dropped off at his apartment. He lives with 3 other guys. I woke up the next morning in one of his roomates bed.. with nothing on but a shirt. I asked the guy what happened and he told me that he had sex with me with and without a condom and that I needed to go get a morning after pill. I dont remember having sex with him or even being in his room. I cant even remember leaving the party. I was heavily intoxicated and feel that I was pretty much raped, though he kept telling me that I wanted it and agreed to it. My friends tell me that when I was taken home I was unable to speak correctly, just wanting to sleep and couldnt stand up alone.

Im afraid to tell my boyfriend, I dont know if he will be upset with me or not. I dont want him to leave me. We’ve been together 4 years and hes the only guy that I have ever had sex with.

I think his roomate is a creep. I never thought he would do something like that since I have been friends with him for about 7 years.

any advice will help. but if youre going to sit and tell me I put myself in the situation, f off. I didnt want to be molested and have some guy have sex with me without a condom. My boyfriend and I dont even do that.

Answer #1

You should go to the hospital and have a blood test. You could have been a victim of Rohypnol (date rape drug).

It’s common to have blackouts when intoxicated, but something as serious as rape isn’t usually something you’re able to forget or not realize was even happening.

Answer #2

You should tell your boyfriend right now so he can beat the sh*t out of that guy…

dont matter what that guy said, he raped you, because even if you said yes, he knew you was drunk and he took advatange of you…you should first tell a family memeber or a close friend

damn I’m even pissed off from reading this…

please tell ya boyfriend, since ya’ll been going out for 4 years he wont be mad at you trust me…

and please go to the doctor to see if everything is alright

Answer #3

You might want to call someone, they either have a hotline or an online chat, they might be able to tell you more…

http://www.rainn.org/

Answer #4

I would consider it rape since you obviously weren’t able to defend yourself, say no or make a conscious decision. Your boyfriend’s roomate took advantage of the situation (you were probably passed out, this is why you can’t remember) and raped you. If I were you I would start with the hospital, test for drugs in your blood stream. I would also tell the doctor what happened and get the morning after pill. Find out if the doctor can see any signs of violence in your vagina and if he can swab any semen from you (to prove the rape occurred). Next you should talk to the police about pressing charges and inform your boyfriend as well as your parents what happened. This is a very serious situation and I think you should take drastic measures in order to avoid this type of thing happening to you or anyone else ever again.

Answer #5

I can relate to this story almost completely. go to the doctor, get a blood test talk to your boyfriend, if you guys have been dating for four years he should understand and if you werent able to function properly, the guy is an asshole for taking advantage of you

Answer #6

If you’re scared about telling your boyfriend…don’t be. If you cheated on him (cheated having the REAL definition of being coherent and making the decision willingly), THEN you should be scared. Telling your boyfriend, however, that one of his roommates had sex with you when you could barely identify YOURSELF is a little *ed up. While he may be upset that you had sex with him, he should understand that it wasn’t consensual and that you didn’t agree to it. At least, that would be my thought process.

Even though you said: “but if youre going to sit and tell me I put myself in the situation, f off. I didnt want to be molested and have some guy have sex with me without a condom. My boyfriend and I dont even do that.”

You need to accept the consequences of your actions. Next time you want to get plastered, you should go with a friend, or even your boyfriend, and stay with him at all times (or tell him/her that) to make sure this doesn’t happen. You don’t get drunk and then go off and do your own thing - that’s basically asking for something like this to happen, however, I’m not blaming you if it sounds like I am.

If you haven’t done so, I would advise to get the morning after Pill. If I remember correctly, they work up to 3 days after the fact. If that’s wrong, someone funmail me and correct me.

Good luck -

Answer #7

yeah go to your doctors , make sure you do that and sorry but you got to tell your boyfriend tell him you think you were drugged because you cant remember anything telll him you were raped he has to believe you his roomate is a jerk he could be doing this to loads of women and if so get checked for std’s

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