Loss of affection, and cheating

Thank you for your response, I’ve talked to lots of people about this and they all have a shallow opinion. Shes back in my arms for the time being, she woke up crying because she thought of me with another woman. I love this girl, but we both agreed to try and make it work, if she cannot trust me we would end it and maybe try again down the road. Really thanks for the response it helped me get a lot off my mind.

Well thanks for the response yummeh, I ended up talking her into being with me, and we both agreed that if she cant trust me that we would end it. She feels bad and half responsible for what happened, but as you said their is no excuse for cheating. I think its going to be tough, but I believe our love is strong enough to get past this.

Update: I got married on July 31st

In my case, I probably wouldn’t be too forgiving (responding to the last question first), however it seems to me as if you have been treated rather badly as it is (I’m assuming this issue extends beyond sex) and she has already cheated on you herself. Two wrongs do not make a right, but she definitely has no right to be condemning you as such (especially considering the fact that she is still talking/ flirting with this guy).

In response to your first question; yes, it was right to tell her. It takes courage to own up to things like that and many people do it and simply think about getting caught. You have confessed to your wrong-doings and although that does not make what you did any better, it still shows that you have remorse and that you want to be truthful and honest. Nobody here will tell you that telling her was wrong. This was a brave move.

As for your second question; to me, I would still say that you deserve to be with her, but I am asking if you really ‘should’ be. The two of you are experiencing a lot of troubles in your relationship and it seems that you can’t get through them without fighting, cheating or mistreating one another. She was unfaithful to you and her behaviour in this regard has continued to some degree and so no one here can say you don’t deserve to be with her (both of you have made mistakes). The real question was that which was aforementioned: do you ‘really’ think you should be together?

Your relationship with this person does not seem to be functioning as it should be. You need to sit down with your partner and talk about these ‘stresses’. If they are causing problems in your relationship, then you can’t be lax in handling them. Work out ways in which you can pay the bills, look after your child, work, etc, whilst still maintaining a healthy relationship. Look into child-care services (even if you only have someone look after your child for an hour each day or so, it could allow you to resolve other problems and feel a lot less stressed overall). Designate some time for your relationship each day, so that you can talk to each other, relax and enjoy each others’ company. These problems that you’re speaking of do not seem to be unresolvable…

Of course there is the possibility that she will not forgive you and so any advice I give about your relationship may be of no use to you. I certainly hope that things work out, but just make sure it is your partner that you love and not the relationship. Sometimes the idea of having a partner (wife in your case) blinds us as to what kind of person that partner is. Consider what has happened in your relationship and from there try to decide if getting back together is really worth it. Good luck :)!

She is a he ;), lol.

um. wow. yea, what she said lmao