Is My Short Story Correct?

First off i found this mistake, “He has no friend” your story is based in the past so you should keep it tense thus turning has into had and no friend.. should be no friends or “he had no one as a friend.

“change school there is no available time in going with Anna.” again try to keep the story all in the correct tense and change verbs into past tense ones such as changed. Also “there is no available time in going with Anna” is difficult to read and is unclear ill try to rephrase it.

I think that this is a good rough for a plot but isnt a very good short story. In my readings short stories should have alot of imagery to paint a clear picture that a novel does with many pages. Also when writing stories try to stay away from the word “there” there shows that something exists and nothing more leaving a very bland story. You should try in future stories spicing it up and being more descriptive with strong action words and adjectives.

If i were to make this into a lengthy story about how he isnt able to tell Helen but when he finally does Anna comes back into the picture creating a conflict. Stories all have conflicts.. rising, climax, then falling action leading to a conclusion.

Anyways i hoped i helped and good luck to you.