Should I stay in this unequal marriage?

I have been married now for 26 years. We both always worked and different shifts. In the beginning I did not mind. I had friends and family to keep busy with. Then a few years later the kids came. When the kids came nothing changed. He never helped with them or even helped around the house. Also since we both worked he never even helped me with the added cost. We always had different bills and different bank accounts. Nothing together. Now after 26 years the kids are grown, family is fewer ect. I feel like now I have been used for sex and laundry and to pay half the bills. (he also makes twice as much as me but we have about the same amount of bills. I wake up 26 years later and see where he has boats, trailers, and all these other big toys and all I have is a clothes and a nice car. (When I started having problem making the bills he told me the problem was my car which cost half the amount of his and he would have helped me find a used car). I got mad at that point has he is driving a $50,000 truck and I’m driving a $20,000. At that point I told him I wanted a divorce and he told me would change and he cried ect. I stayed. Now I think the years of not being together, not sharing, ect…Has took a toll on me and I feel I need more from my marriage. He is being nicer ect…but still gets upset if I ask for any money. And when he offers me $20 or $30 he thinks he is doing me a huge favor and I should be grateful…I feel nothing will ever change and he works on the weekends (his choice) and I feel I will never get to go any where as a couple. And after this amount of time I’m not sure I want to. I feel so guilty because the last time I asked for a divorce he cried and told me I would leave him broke and homeless. Now I just confused on what I want and what I need. He thinks everything is ok…Should I stay and be numb or should I take my chances? Every day I change my mind from staying or going…Please help me. I am even in therapy and it’s not helping.

Answer #1

GET RID OF HIM 26YRS ARE YOU WILLING TO DIE IN THAT MESS TRUST ME LIFE WILL ONLY BEGIN WHEN YOU CLOS THE DOOR I JUST DID THINK ABOUT YOUSELF GIRLFRIEND DON’T GET CAUGHT UP IN MORALS WHEN YOU’RE THE ONLY ONE THAT’S HOLDING ON TO THAT . LIVE YOUR LIFE OR CONTINUE TO LIVE MISERABLY WHILE HE’S VERY WELL CONTENT. I PRAY THAT YOU’RE NOT STILL THEIR.

Answer #2

If you are very sure about that you will be able to keep yourself financially, maybe better if he is not “leeching” on you, then you may just throw out him.

Answer #3

Before calling it quits I think both of you need to go to marriage counseling together. Think back to the old days when you two were so in love & you did things together…try doing things that you used to enjoy doing together & maybe it’ll bring your marriage back to life.

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