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I dont know what to do
My husband is deployed overseas and I just asked him if it was okay for a friend of mine to stay with me for a couple of day to hang out.. While my friends is a guy and had a big crush on me in high school and told my husband once that he loved me.. I have been friends with him forever so I did not see a problem with letting him stay at my apartment for a couple of days.. Well when I asked my husband if it was okay with him he told me that he did not trust him alone with me… I dont see why but I listened to what he had to say… After trying to tell him that I dont think my friend would try anything and him telling me that he feels worthless because he is there and if something happened to me he would not be here to protect me like a husband should.. Well finally he said if you want him there then fine with me..
My problem is if my friends does come and stay I feel like I am letting my husband down since he asked me not to let him come.. But if I tell my friend that my husband said that he could not come I would feel like I dont trust him either.. I dont know what to do… Someone please help me …
Thank you all for your advice.. I am thinking that if my friend has a problem with my decision not to let him stay here, then he was planing on doing something..
I have looked at this from both views and would act the same if it was my husband in my place… thank you again
The person above me makes a good point, but at the same time, that is one extremely weak man. He probably already had feelings for that girl, and finally founded an excuse to act on them. But I say that you should respect what your husband is feeling. He’s probably upset enough not being able to be home with you.
..It doesn’t matter if YOU can trust him. Marriage is a two-way street.
Flip it.
How would you feel if, say, you were in the Air Force, and while you were away, your husband wanted some woman who had a crush on him in high school was coming to stay with him. I know you wouldn’t like that.
Go with what your husband has to say. There’s no reason why a man should be staying at your house while your husband is over seas. If you’d like to hang out with him I don’t see a problem with that, but staying with you? That’s a bit much.
Yes reb1312 makes a very good point. You need to look at things from not only your husband’s perspective, but from a bystander’s perspective. Anyone in their right mind would fear that something might happen and that he might try something. Your husband obviously appreciates you waiting for him, but you do need to remember the basics of trust. Your friend would understand if/ why your husband is a bit uneasy about this.
You’ve made the right choice :)!
you have a point I have deciede to hang out with him at my dad’s instead of at my apartment.. I just dont see why my husband can’t trust him… I mean I can but hell I have been wrong before
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