Girls? Friend zone?

Anyway we met randomely. We didnt talk much at first but over the next couple of weeks we got pretty close, but she had a boyfriend. I eventually told her how I feel and she said there was heaps she wanted to tell me but she had a boyfriend. 2 days later they broke up and we had ‘the conversation’ lol. I saw her that night and we didnt hook up or anything it was really casual and then shes like I have really strong feelings for you - but nothing can happen… that was a LONG conversation of her explaining that she can’t deal with a relationship - thats why she broke up with her boyfriend… but everything between us was still flirty and lots of baby’s and pet names, I love you, she’d call me at random, text me at random etc etc. THEN she told me she didnt have feelings for me anymore, and then proceeded to act exactly the same… still lots of pet names etc. She AVOIDS conversations about guys with me… like avoids them.. and she still says shes really nervous around me…

I dunno… to me it sounds like its all there but shes trying to fight it because she doesnt feel like she can handle a relationship… or am I completely wrong?

forgot to add…

she often calls me ‘the perfect guy’ and tells me love songs remind her of me… and almost every time we’re on the phone and she’ll get tired and say how much she wants to go to sleep and ill be like oh ok - do you want me to let you go? and she’ll ALWAYS be like no, I want to talk to you, just keep me awake.

it always gets to the situation where she makes ME end the conversation.

Answer #1

It’s remarkable how similar this sounds to a dilemma I had (though my girlfriend never said her feelings died). This is a weird situation to be in because my current girlfriend didn’t want to be in a relationship with me (despite how strong her feelings were). In this case your bond seems even better than ours was.

Your assumption is correct. This girl wants you, but is too afraid of a relationship with you. I’m not sure what kind of a person she is, so there’s not much I can say there. She obviously doesn’t realise (similar to my girlfriend) that you two are ‘really’ already in a relationship. She just isn’t making it official (maybe she’s scared that’ll change things).

Fear is one big possibility as to why she won’t accept a relationship and you should never push too hard if this is the reason. You need to think about your feelings. If you are genuinely interested in this person and you want to be with her, assure her that you won’t be a come-and-go type of guy. Let her know that you genuinely want her to be your girlfriend and let her know that you won’t be a burden. Ultimately, your understanding of her will lead to the best conclusion.

Hope that helps mate!!!

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