How to get my husband to understand my decision

I’m confused about your husband’s standpoint. “…unable to convince him.” -is he saying that you CAN’T do it? -or is he fine with it but thinks you’re dumb? if you’ve explained your reasons to him and he’s letting you go through with it, but doesn’t agree with it, then I’d say you’ve done all that you can. bottom line is that an unassisted waterbirth in your apartment IS a stupid idea. that’s like deciding to do your own surgery, only you’re not a doctor. you really won’t know what you’re doing, and it’s fairly technical. the only way things will work out right is if you give birth to a perfectly healthy baby. if there’s ANYTHING wrong with it, you’re in over your head. your husband probably sees this as a problem. if he’s not willing to let you go through with it, then I can see your being mad as a reasonable response…but if he disagrees with you but is respecting your decision, what more do you want?! -anyways, more details, please.

It sounds like you have made up your mind and you aren’t even considering your husband’s feelings in this manner. It is true that you are the one birthing the child, but it is (I hope) his baby too. He just wants what is best for you and his infant. If you want to convince him, those would be the lines to expand on, and let him know that his feelings are being taken into account.

FYI: Unassisted childbirth is NOT illegal in ANY of the 50 states OR Mexico and has less risk than going to a hospital (where sick people go). Please do not post an answer in the future before actually researching the subject. None of these answers have been helpful or correct. Just because that is the way you feel, I have EVERY RIGHT to have my birth any way I choose, and, as I previously stated, I will not heed any of your ignorant spewing on this subject.

Could you let us know what experience and information have led you to your decision, please? I guess that, like my own sister-in-law, you had a bad experience of hospital birth with your first child, and have looked for an alternative this time, where you feel more in control of what will be going on. She, and another friend, each went for home births for their third child. If we know what is influencing your choice, then we may be able to give better advice about your husband. Thanks.

I don’t know how wise ‘unassisted’ would be - what if something goes wrong - maybe you can find a professional to speak to your husband…I wish your family the very best !!

Performing your own surgery and giving birth alone are not even comparable! Childbirth is not a procedure, it is a natural process. Women instinctively know how to give birth. They’ve just been scared into thinking that the hospital is the safest place to give birth; however, the U.S. has one of the highest maternal and infant mortality rates of industrialized nations.

Is he willing to read anything on unassisted childbirth? The Bornfree website is good. Laura Shanley who does this website also wrote a book called Unassisted Childbirth. There are videos on YouTube of unassisted childbirths. There is a movie called The Business of Being Born - but that focuses more on midwife-attended homebirths.

This is a good article/video

http://abcnews.go.com/GMA/TurningPoints/story?id=4098198&page=1

Good luck! (I am still working on convincing my husband of the benefits)