http://www.funadvice.com/my/advice/roundaboutalley Love a wonderful interesting conversation. It's such a huge turn-on. Love to learn new things, travel, wonderful food, love to swim and learn new languages. I''ve traveled a lot and want to do more of it! en-us I think that you need to believe your feeling, I think your desires don't lie. What I do feel is that most men do. They love sex and how it feels and many stop at that. As for a commitment, leave that to the women, but they get their hearts broken DURING the relationship, men get their hearts broken AFTER the women feel they can't take it any more. That is where it all stands. Don't lose who you are!!! You can;t depend on guys to make you feel better, at least with most of them. take care! roundaboutalley Sun, 16 Mar 2008 20:41:22 -0700 http://www.funadvice.com/q/married_and_wanting_to_have_an_affair 267270 What is selfish? SELFISH? And what is it's opposite? Is it's opposite better? roundaboutalley Sat, 19 Jan 2008 11:06:15 -0800 http://www.funadvice.com/q/married_and_wanting_to_have_an_affair 192974 housemouse One thing i thought about, to do along with anything else you may want to do or think about is speak with your husband about your feelings. When you both have time and the desire to speak? It's difficult for my husband and I, close to impossible, but I think that that would be a great thing to do. To learn more about yourselves and what you want. do you respect each other? Just a question which is important. your list is good. and you are right. sometimes you even get answers from the questions you ask yourself. Hope all else is going well for you. roundaboutalley Tue, 09 Oct 2007 19:56:35 -0700 http://www.funadvice.com/q/married_and_wanting_to_have_an_affair 110420 Perhaps wait for your instincts to tell you something else? What is your feeling when you close your eyes? It's great you had amazing sex with your husband. Flowers are great, but there has to be more than that, no? I've been having an affair since April. We've been through lots of up and down. Emotional about our time together and apart. Sometimes I delete his number from my phone, don't here from him for a week or two and then he calls again. He says I am non-judgemental about him and life. But there are things I would love in a relationship whip I don't get from him and I am learning about that. But sex is great, our talks are awesome, and I feel great when I am with him. Hate the sneaking around and when I spend too much time with him, I start to feel the guilt. That part I do not like. But it is all a learning experience, and we are very comfortable with each other. In a way, we create a fantasy for each other. We are both married, both have kids, the same age and sometimes we speak about our families. He makes me laugh which I love and at this point, I am leaning alot about myself. Sometimes it allows me to tolerate aspects of my other life. Our partners don't know. I would be mortified if they ever found out. If I were dating him like any normal relationship, the gult would not be there. That is disturbing. Feel your heart and see what your image tells you. Do you think you need to decide now? Is it about making a choice? Because you love one, does that mean you can't have an interest for another? you don't need to go all the way. Just have a nice meal or something aand that may guide you in a better direction. roundaboutalley Tue, 09 Oct 2007 15:46:57 -0700 http://www.funadvice.com/q/married_and_wanting_to_have_an_affair 110250 housemouse Happy Birthday to you. I am so sorry about the day. I know it wasn't the present, it was the fine details, wonderful gestures of love and understanding which is capable of moving a mountain! So what's wrong with listening to the woman inside you? I totally read what some people wrote about not having an affair and completely understand, but things are not so easy. sometimes it takes a while to separate from someone. sometimes you need 100 proofs before you finally get it. Our society is not conditioned to live alone and that is scarry. I've been through a divorce already, no kids, but it was very difficult for both of us. We are close now but who can tell if that will ever happen. I say, don't be afraid, try going out for dinner, see how that feels. Even to have a man recognize you across the table will be an improvement. The feeling of you wanted to get dressed up is a turn on... I don't want to say that a man's opinion of you gives you worth, because to feel worthy is composed of so many parts, but it will feel nice, and you will know that you CAN feel something different for someone else. In the mean time, also do things to pamper yourself. What ever that may be. Have someone give you a message, or get your nails done or what ever it is that you would consider pampering yourself and in the mean time...see how else you feel. roundaboutalley Mon, 08 Oct 2007 22:18:30 -0700 http://www.funadvice.com/q/married_and_wanting_to_have_an_affair 109827 Would you tell your husband of 19 years? If you do is it still an affair? I think an affrair is great to feel sooo much again. Wonderful to know that you still have something that could turn someone else on. This you don't get from a book or a friend telling you. You get it from the experience if you aren't getting it from my husband. I for example got my hair cut today. My husband did not notice and if he were asked what I am wearing, he would not know. This sucks!!! An affair is a quick fix to a bigger situation but for me, it helps. roundaboutalley Mon, 01 Oct 2007 19:26:43 -0700 http://www.funadvice.com/q/married_and_wanting_to_have_an_affair 106287 So this story repeats it self. Cheating, staying together for the kids, fear of really being alone especially when you aren't 20 any more. In an affair for the past 5 mons. What I get out of it is feeling sexy again. Holding someone with passion even if it's only for a short time. Knowing that I can love and that someone can be wild about me. Something I don't get from my husband. I adore my two small children. Don't want to run away to to with another man. It will just end up where I am with my huusband. If this true passion does not last for ever, at least I know I can get it, feel it, smell it for a few moments. Better than nothing at all. Sounds sad but it's all I have right now. roundaboutalley Sun, 23 Sep 2007 20:16:45 -0700 http://www.funadvice.com/q/married_and_wanting_to_have_an_affair 102691