Why can't my man cum?

My boyfriend and I have been together for a year and a couple months. And have been having sex for 11 months. But I have not seen any actual cum come out his penis except for a lil bit of precum. Hes only 19 and says its cause hes been having sex a lot...

in the past. I have read info on the computer but of course it doesn't help at all. I have to admit that I do tell him I want to have his baby now. We are in a long distance relationship but we see each other either evry weekend or every other. I talk to him every day except when he on the job and even then he calls to check up on me. I know hes not cheating (at lease thats what I believe). I also know I have some good stuff, if you know what I mean. So why cant he cum?

He may go to a doctor. Maybe somethings wrong with down there. But maybe it's this.. for me and my man we would do it for a while and he wouldn't cum. He thought something was wrong with him. That's not the case. Given more time, you have to let him find the right place. Where it hurts the most and feels the greatest. He'll feel pressure and there the trigger goes.

its him tlk 2 him about it an mayb you an him should come to a conclusion a doctor may b able 2 help you 2

Hold on everybody. Orgasm happens when sexual pleasure becomes overwhelming, and even having orgasm as a goal makes it less likely. The pressure many of you have applied and endured would be sufficient to render orgasm impossible for almost anybody. Porn isn't the problem, it is a safe way to have sex without pressure. At least if a man can get off through masturbation, you know there is nothing wrong with his equipment.

Stop worrying about why he doesn't come and put your attention on increasing his pleasure during sex instead. If he enjoys it, you're doing it right, whether he comes or not. This problem, like premature ejaculation, is an affliction of the ignorant.

This happened to me last night but im sure its happened more hes been hiding it from me well I couldnt really tell at first but then last night im like thats all just me,I feel like its m fault or im not good enough for him But we did it again in the morning and everything was fine so I don't know maby hes just tired from work sometimes or sex is overrated maby,well weve been thru a lot and I've been feeling no connection to him lately and no sexual chemistry even thou hes hard and all like empty towards him maby we just are not compatible cause I felt sexual fireworks with my ex all the time then with him its like dead almost like you could hear a cricket chirp between us and its kind of akward

Well some good answers here.
Anyway this started happening to me like a month or so (I am 32), while masturbating. I think it has a lot to do with your hormones also. I lost a lot of weight in 2 months, while completely changing my food intake (very dry non fat sugar stuff) and started excercising heavily. Doctor said that such sudden change of regime completely threw me out of balance on hormones level. It was strange not to cum for me - I used to have fantastic sex with my ex; sometimes even 3-5 times per day. So I don`t know what it was exactly; perhaps my hormones, perhaps the fact that I remmembered our reletionship exactly at the moment I was doing my thing and I got sad about it...
Anyway I found it like I lost my sex compass about when to play and how to have fun, because I now often loose the interest or rather fantasies don`t arrouse me that much anymore and that really disturbes me + as some of you mentioned you really can`t force yourself as much as you would like to.
Went to the doctor to get my blodwork chacked and body chemistry so I am waiting now to see if it is also Physical or just mental block I created in my head. What I belive is that only being with someone that truly makes you feel free and you can talk and play with can melt such problems (if only mental). We guys have a lot of presure on us from early age like how to be real man and macho. Scoring girls, spreading seed... but sometimes we also want just to feel love, trust, share our emotional problems, fears... I was always the happiest person in the world (and satisfied when I was able to share myself like that with the person I loved.

MY EX BOYFRIEND HAD THE SAME PROBLEM BUT THEN I FOUND OUT HE WAS USING CRYSTAL METH WHICH IT DOESN'T MAKE HIM CUM MAYBE ITS THAT OR SUM OTHER TYPE OF DRUG ...IF NOT I'LL SAY HE SHOULD GO AND SEE A DOCTOR.

okayyy you all are weird, if your boyfriends cant come. then maybe you guys mad eyour way around town too much and your loose, or they just dont like you. my god get off the comp and go try to make them cum at least...lol wow

you guysss are loosersss get a life! maybe your men just dont like you becaus eyour looose

Geez lots of comments on this one, well I'm a male, and I have suffered from this problem for far too long, I enjoy sex, god know I do, but I just can't seem to reach that final stage no matter what, only on my own can I cum.
I've researched into this as I am worried and what I have fun is that it is called delayed ejaculation, or retarded ejaculation - which I dont like the sounds of if im honest, anyway this is more liekly to be a phsycological issue preventing him from cumming and with a sexual therapist can be helped, tho it doesnt cause problems persay it can when trying to conceive and for the man on my part atleast it is embarrassing and a shame try not to make a big deal out of it but suggest the therapy and see what happens

You gotta be able to trust your guy to not masturbate. Me and my boyfriend don't masturbate anymore and it provides a better experience for the both of us. Now my boyfriend has cummed, yes, but it took foreevveerrr. Its because he would masturbate around 2-3 a day to porn. It still takes a while, but its much better than it was. plus, not masturbating is a good idea. It makes a better orgasm for the girl as well.

im 17 and my boyfriend and I have been having sex for the past couple of months and hes the first boy who can't cum with me. I got told that it may be nerves and that I have to 'arouse his mind' by talking dirty and such, but so far nothing. apparently he needs to relax with a bit of alcohol or something but what I want to suggest is that he doesnt help himself for a while until he's despo for it and then maybe he'll find it easier. I'm yet to find out..

I am a 40 year old man and after reading through this post I can`t help but find the comments by many of the women to be very simplistic. Firstly, just as all women are different, all men are different. A great many women cannot reach orgasm through vaginal sex. However, the books and professionals out there all tell women that this is perfectly fine and to look at alternate ways to reach orgasm (oral, manual, anal stimulation, etc.) So why is it that if a man takes a long time to cum through vaginal sex women ask what`s wrong with him?
There`s nothing wrong with him and if you plan to be with him for an extended period, find ways that you both enjoy sex and don`t worry too much about one aspect of sex.
Personally I`ve always taken a long time to cum. Even as a teenager I needed more than an hour to cum and as I`ve aged, it usually takes a minimum of 2-3 hours and yes there are times when I do not cum.
If your goal is not to get pregnant and he is happy with your lovemaking even when he doesn`t cum, don`t worry about it. I`d guess that pretty much every woman has had sex at least once without reaching climax. But that doesn`t mean she didn`t enjoy the sex.
Maybe you should consider the “your turn, my turn” approach in which one of you helps the other reach orgasm and then trade. He may be able to cum more easily by hand and/or mouth and don`t forget to add in flavored lubricants and other fun things.
One of my past girlfriends was very happy with our sex life but when she had had enough for the night and I hadn`t yet cum, she would let me know and I would finish myself by hand. She enjoyed my masturbating myself while I was between her legs so that the back of my knuckles stimulated her while I finished.
I`m engaged now and my fiancée and I are interested in having a baby so we discussed it and decided that even when I finish by means other than vaginal sex, I let her know when I`m about to cum, with a countdown from 10, so that I can enter her as I cum.
One thing that we have found is that after an hour or two of sex it helps me to cum more easily if we take a break for 15-20 minutes before continuing. This works because after an hour or more of sex, the penis can start to go numb. A short break changes that and it can be very sensitive after the break.
In conclusion, if you`re both enjoying sex and don`t plan to get pregnant right now, just enjoy the sex, try alternate activities other than vaginal sex and by all means let him know that he can finish with his own hand when you`re done for the night. You can still play a nice role by stimulating him while he finishes. If you`ve decided to have a baby, maybe you have to be more technical about it and just let him masturbate until he`s ready to cum. If as some of the ladies have written, he needs porn to cum, put on some porn.
If my fiancée had told me she wanted to have sex daily to have a better chance of getting pregnant, I would have told her that the only way for me to do that would be by my own hand. Daily sex of 3+ hours just isn`t practical or desirable and there would definitely be lots of days that I wouldn`t be able to cum on a schedule like that.
I hope this give the ladies a different point of view to consider.

if he can cum whle masturbating just let him masterbate then while cum is coming out have sex it might get you pregnat

I dont know what to do my boyfriend has not cum in 4 years he said it is not me but sometimes I think it is know I cant keep him hard.I know that his age is not helping us he is 51 and I am 38.this has caused such a problem for me that we split for 2 months I wanted to see if it was me but found out it was not. I missed him so much we are back toughter but I still dont know what to do about the problem. any one have any ideas please help...

I have not been able to finish for many years. When I was married now divorced over 24 years , I was able to very easily.
I have had a vissectomy (spelling bad), and I think that might have had a problem. But I also don't sleep well either. And I think that might have a bit to do with it.
I have had many lady friends over the years and it's all the same, I can't finish. It may be tiredness, or stress, or something. I believe there are many of us out there that can't finish and it has nothing to do with the mate he is with. Be thinkful he can still get it up as many men can't. If he says he still get pleasure even when he can't finish, then trust him when he says it. I still enjoy pleasing her and I do get pleasure from it as well.

either he has probalems, or you dontt give him enough pleasure

Same thing happens with my boyfried and I. It was very frustrating due to the fact that we want to have a baby. In this case he does have an orgasm but nothing comes out. I brought him to the doctor and it was diagnosed as Retrograde Ejaculation where basically when they cum the sperm shoots the opposite way into there bladder instead and is expelled the next time they go to the washroom. (most of the time you can't even tell) He is on meds now (they contain the same kinda stuff as cold medecines) and that should fix things shortly. So if you're worried about this you should take him to the doctor he may have this especially if he is a diabetic like my guy, it is highly likely. Hope this helps someone.

I dont think my situation is the same as everyone elses, I mean because I am able to finish during intercourse,its just that my girlfriend and I have been having sex a lot lately and the feeling has sorta worn down so im not able to finish anymore,I mean I can it just takes TOO long and my girlfriend cant handle it she says that she finishedd a while ago and it starts to feel bad for her, should we just take a break from sex,because im woried that the good feeling I used to have during sex is slowly fading

maybe he's strested ?

I have a Qs My Fiancee I am his first he lost virginity too. and we have had a lot of sex but one Qs If he would watch porns or something would it help him to cum in me?
Or What Should he do to make his self cum. As we all have sex Masterbation helps which hes done quite a bit of that. And Im good at giving him a huge hard on but He hates it when he feels that hes ready to cum then it goes away.. So What do you think we should do we do a lot of Role playing and all that kissing and soft touch that turns eachother on then I let him controll me in bed so ( That way he can controll how hes getting turned on..I am completly statified He just wanted to know what can he do to get himself off other then Masterbation?
I tell him to close his eyes Think of things that really turn him on moan. do whatever It will work.
So any suggestion? Thanks for whom who answers