Why am I so sad?

okay last night I thought of this past summer and the summer before that well the summer before that my dog died and I have a hard time dealing with that and this past summer I was sexually abused I told my mom but he raped three girls before he did what he did rto me and I kept it inside knowing I can't trust guys that much I have depression but I haven't been taken it because it don't work I still feel sad I don't want these doctors just telling what I might have I just want to know whats wrong with me because everytime I feel this way I want to commit suicide and my moms trying to find me a therpist I just want to be happy like I use to be

Yes I know what its like to wish you could make it like that never happened. And you want to run away from that problem. First off did you go to court to file that sexually abuse thing? You should get that thing that pervents them from comming towards you for a certain distance. Another thing I think will be good for you is to talk to a therapist. I know you probaly dont want to talk about it but I think it will make you feel better afterwards. Another thing I think you should do is either move so you can forget the problem or Lean and talk to friends. And maybe go to a group where they talk about sexually abuse.

well I personally think you felt better after you typed this. its better to get it off your back, first things first though I would definally talk to that docter your mom wants you to see, because if you can write this message you can talk to a docter that noes what hes doing, see how that goes if you dont like him tell your mom you want to stop seeing the docter. I don't know from there.

You should try writeing try to find some kind of outlet for your emotions...I know how hard it is but if you try to find somthing and concentrate on it it will help keep your mind busy.