Been having weird thoughts like this for about a month

Ok, so things havent been the greatest lately, to say the least. Life doesnt seem so great anymore, I dont really know.
A while ago, maybe about a year and a half ago, I self-harmed myself a bit. But I stopped, and havent done it since. It feels good to not harm myself.
But lately, I've been getting thoughts to do it. Mostly late at night, when im just thinking. Its tempting, but I really dont want to go back down that road. I dont really know what to do though, its hard. I've been having weird thoughts like this for about a month or so. Im not sure what to do.
Im proud that I havent done it in more than a year, but I dont know, its hard times right now, and it just seems tempting. I dont know what to do.

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Just like a person that has a drinking problem or a drug problem there are going to be times that you think about it more often than other times. You need to find something else that you can do when you start to thinking about it. Like write down your feelings, or light a nice smelling candle, or find a friend you can call and talk to. Anything enjoyable that you can do to show yourself that you are worth way more than cutting yourself. You have so much to offer, because you overcame a problem that has caused problems for a lot of people. Think about getting on message boards related to the subject and give someone else some encouragement. Good luck to you.

Why do you think you want to do it? You need to seek help, because your weak when it comes to self mutilation. It's okay to seek help, you need to do so. Seek professional counseling. People think they get relief by self mutilation. They think it takes away the pain and thoughts providing relief. That's far from true. What happens is after you do it, your mind is put on cleaning up and hiding the evidence and that's where the relief comes in. You had a few minutes to take your mind off of you and your problems and put it on cleaning up or hiding the evidence. Don't allow your mind to take control, learn to resist. The more you do the stronger you'll become. Begin a journal and annotate, when you get the thoughts, what was happening prior to or during, and what did you do to get past thinking about it. Keep this journal, read and re read it. It strengthens you. Most importantly seek help.

Why do you think you want to do it? You need to seek help, because your weak when it comes to self mutilation. It's okay to seek help, you need to do so. Seek professional counseling. People think they get relief by self mutilation. They think it takes away the pain and thoughts providing relief. That's far from true. What happens is after you do it, your mind is put on cleaning up and hiding the evidence and that's where the relief comes in. You had a few minutes to take your mind off of you and your problems and put it on cleaning up or hiding the evidence. Don't allow your mind to take control, learn to resist. The more you do the stronger you'll become. Begin a journal and annotate, when you get the thoughts, what was happening prior to or during, and what did you do to get past thinking about it. Keep this journal, read and re read it. It strengthens you. Most importantly seek help.

Do you see anyone? Are you taking medication? I think it goes without saying these two things need to be done. I'm not saying your crazy, but more than likely you have a disorder that needs treated.

I used to want to die everyday. But after being successfully treated I've gone over a year without any bad thoughts. Yes it took me a year to find the right meds that worked and help from my doctor, but I can say my thoughts of self harm are completely gone. Some people think they can get over it themselves, but its just not true. It's the same as being a diabetic, would they be able to get over their symptoms? Not at all. They may even die without their treatments. There is nothing wrong with getting help and there isn't much we here can do for you other than emotional support.

If you have already gotten help from a psychiatrist and you are just venting here, I'm sorry about your relapse. We all fall once in a while. But try your hardest not to do it again, it will be so much harder to stop once you've picked back up. If there is another way to cope than that by all means do it. I like to write every thought in my mind down, and then it I can leave there in the paper instead of on my mind.

Does it have anything to do with your girlfriend probs?

thanks for all the responses.

to answer some questions, no im not on any medications, no im not seeing anybody for it or anything like that. I really dont want my parents knowing, or having to pay for me to see somebody about it, money is tight and I have 4 siblings, I dont need to take away from there lives for me.

I dont really know if it is my girlfriend problems, its a mixture of a lot of things...life just isnt going how I thought it would be, its hard. when I think about what needs to be done to make it better, it seems so easy. but in reality, its really hard, and seems so far away.

I do a lot to keep my mind off of it, I play guitar, write music and stuff like that. but most of the time when I start thinking about it, its late at night. it stops me from sleeping, I stay up until 4 or 5 in the morning thinking about it, and there isnt much I can do except just try hard not to do it. I cant play guitar, theres nobody I could talk to, there all sleeping. its just hard.

I've tried writing before, but it doesnt really help. I mean, it makes me feel a little lighter, like I've let some things go. but then I usually start thinking about it again. I dont know...

there arent many people I can talk to, I dont want my parents knowing, because they'll probably send me away. and if I tell my girlfriend, im scared that she might freak out a little. I dont have many friends, but the ones I do have are pretty trust worthy, but not enough. I dont want everybody to find out and talk about me like that, because I'll end up getting in a fight and getting in huge touble.

so im not too sure on what to do. its hard