Starved for love!

okay so, when I was about 2 years old, I think I might have been sexually abused but I cant really remeber it too well or who did it so I cant really go to the police and I dont want to. plus I dont know if I am remembering that or I just drempt it when...

I was little or am remembering somebody giving me a bath. anyway, my whole life I have been starved for love... I always am wanting to feel loved by boys. I flirt with any guy who isnt a complete dirtball, to the point where most of them end up crushing on me. I am still a virgin (unless you count the sexual abuse), although I have done other sexual things with this guy I have been in love with for 5 years who just doesnt seem to feel more towards me than lust and a brotherly sisterly bond. I am so sick of wanting to be loved! I always want hugs from the guy I like because I feel safe with him. I cry sometimes when im not around him and I want to live a life where I can really stop feeling like I need all the attention from guys on me so I can stop feeling insecure about the abuse (if its even real) and move on with my life. help!

are you saying you got raped??