Sex with a older man at 16teen

hello my name is amber I just turned 16teen years old and I have been dating this older guy 4 about 1 year and I lost my virginity 2 him by the way he's 24 year old and I just found out that im pregnant and I have not told my mother yet that im pregnant but I told marques the man that got me pregnant that I was pregnant and he told me he does not want the baby and he told me I was a lieing and he left me so I need yall help on how to tell my mother I have been having sex and now im pregnant and the man that got me pregnant does not want to be in the babys life my mother is going to be pissed when I tell her could yall help me on how 2 tell my mother im pregnant help me please and I just found out that marques have a wife and he told me sh going to beat my little ass but I didnt know about her I just found out about 2 days ago im so seared I run to shcool every day because I think is really going to kick my ass help me please

I hate to say it, but I won't lie to you...I doubt your parents will take you back in. I think you should find a local shelter and stay there. I found these FREE hotlines you should try calling.

For General Teen Help (any subject/crisis):
National Teen Emergency Hotline: 1-800-448-3000
National Crisis Help Line: 1-800-233-4357

For Depression:
National Depression Association: 1-800-826-3632

For Pregnancy:
Planned Parenthood (connects you with your local clinic): 1-800-230-7526 http://www.PlannedParenthood.org

For Runaway Services / Shelter:
Family Youth Interventions: 1-810-758-7040
Runaway RAP Line: 1-800-292-4517

For Suicide Prevention:
National Youth Crisis Helpline: 1-800-999-9999
National Adolescent Suicide Hotline: 1-800-621-4000
Teen Suicide Prevention Hotline: 1-800-949-0057

GOOD LUCK AND HOPE IT HELPS! I THINK IT WOULD BE BETTER TO GET A PROFESSIONAL'S OPINION. THEY DEAL WITH MORE OF THIS KIND OF STUFF ON A DAILY BASIS. NOT MANY PEOPLE ON THIS WEBSITE ARE IN OR HAVE BEEN IN A SITUATION AS COMPLICATED AS YOURS. I DID WHAT I COULD. GOOD LUCK AGAIN! OH...BUT I WILL SAY THIS...LEAVE THAT MAN ALONE. HE'S ONLY BROUGHT MORE TROUBLE!

My first question is: How did you meet this 24 year-old "man"?

I think you should just tell your mom ASAP, because the sooner you tell her, the less mad she'll be. Don't let her find out when your stomach gets big. You first need to tell her what happened, apologize for not telling her about your relationship sooner, and ask for help. Crying works too, but only if it's sincere and you don't have too bad a history of getting in trouble. She WILL be mad but she'll probably still want to help you. Most mothers are very protective about their kids, especially their daughters. Your mom can have Marques arrested for Statutory Rape (DEFINITION @: http://www.sexlaws.org/statrape.html)or Indecency with a Child and can help you get a restraining order against his wife. Being 16 years old myself, I understand how you may feel about this person but you have to realize that he doesn't have those same feelings for you. I looked up this website for you. It has some good info, you might want to check it out.

This is from sexlaws.org: "All states have an "age of consent," or an age at which a person can legally consent to sexual activity and can then no longer be a victim of statutory rape. Some states also have laws that look at the age difference between the two people as well as their individual ages. All states have laws that have restrictions on the relationship between the two people, changing the age of consent, or the penalty, for sexual relations between a person of authority, such as a teacher, assistant coach, or tutor. These laws change, and can vary depending on other circumstances. For more information on how these laws apply in the various states, try the Answer Board. (http://www.sexlaws.org/answers/) You can try the 'Contact Information' link too. Hope this helps! Good luck! Let me know how it goes!

Hi Amber.. It's me again redd05. I already replied but here's more.
Go to http://incestabuse.about.com/cs/restrainingorders/ for info about Restraining Orders and Orders of Protection.

well, your mother will always be there, he obviously will not...he has proved that. you are the only one to ultimately make the decision on what to do with your baby. what are your beliefs? from what I've read, in your situation, I don't believe you are ready. even if he was in the pic still, it just doesn't sound good. he is really a coward by acting as if this is a big conspiracy against him. men, to be honest, react weird to situations like this. it made him feel better to create an argument, point everything at you, and then have good reason enough (to him) to leave....typical. you should go to your mom regardless, you would be surprised! you should have known, that the age difference, does eventually affect you both. maybe he knew it would never be a forever, so this was a great time to skate. I am sorry, I hope you make the right choice FOR YOU. in the end you will alays have you, be good to yourself...good will show in eveything that you do. in return, life will be better, promise!

I also wanted to add...don't worry about the wife, she has right to be mad. she is just not handling it right. she should leave him, not threaten you. if you have to run to school, then do it! just keep yourself in school, please don't ruin a good/great future over this, time will heal it! go to the police, they have, I am sure, seen this before. you are not alone, so don't be embarrassed, or think you are a chiken...it is called being smart, outsmart them. so what, she may be able to "beat you up" she sounds mature. if you can't talk to her, then don't. stay away, you need to focus on yourself and what your future holds. don't add salt to the wound. will your mom step in and mediate? that may help...

good advice, hopefully she will look into that. she does have a case,I believe. marques will get...well, what was coming. he had to play and now he must pay!!

well I told my mother and father they disowned me they are racist and they are members of the
klan here in mississippi and marques happents 2 be black and I got into a
big fight with my mother and father now im homeless with my unborn not wanted
child what do I do next I dont know what to do I want to kill myself I feel really depressed I want to take my own life Suicide when I need my family the mosted they turn they backs on me I lost my will 2 live so today im filled with anger hate im scared of being a outcast and afraid of common fate I feel like no 1 cares I feel like im backed into a corner alone very confused tired of running my childhood has been abused and I dont know what 2 do I went 2 bed in the park last night I dont know what 2 do next what do I do im at the Library right now today I saw my mother and see acted like she didnt see me she look at me and then looked down like she hated me or something I called marques today he brought me something to eat had sex with me and then dropped me back off at the library I feel really dumb 4 leting that happen but I didnt know where else to turn 2 marques told me he is going 2 come back 2 get at 5pm from library and the library closes at 8pm I could come stay with him he has his own house but im still dont want to go there because what if his comes over there help I dont know what 2 do im only a TEENAGER

I DONT BELIEVE HE IS GOING TO COME BACK 2 GET ME FROM THE
library BECAUSE HE STILL DOES NOT want to BE IN THE BABYS LIFE AND IM NOT READY 4 A CHILD I THINK HE WAS JUST TELL ME WHAT I WANTED TO HEAR 2 HAVE SEX WITH ME HE DONT WANT ME 2 COME AND LIVE WITH HE JUST TOLD ME THAT 2 HAVE SEX WITH ME if I call my mother and father and tell I dont want to have the baby I want to have a abortion do yall think they will let me back in the family I dont know

Hey!...
The best way to do it is when shes not tired...because if she is tried...shell overreact....just say...mom im sorry...I've been sleeping with this guy...and now im pregnant and he dont want the baby...then you may want to talk about your options with her....keep the baby....adoption....or whatnot.....

Hey!...
The best way to do it is when shes not tired...because if she is tried...shell overreact....just say...mom im sorry...I've been sleeping with this guy...and now im pregnant and he dont want the baby...then you may want to talk about your options with her....keep the baby....adoption....or whatnot.....

Were you quoting Tupac Shakur's poem "AND TOMORROW"?

"Today is filled with anger fueled with hidden hate/scared of being outcast afraid of common fate/Today is built on tragedies which no one wants 2 face/nightmares 2 humanities & morally disgraced/Tonight is filled with rage violence in the air/children bred with ruthlessness because no one at home cares/Tonight I lay my head down but the pressure never stops/gnawing at my sanity content when I am dropped/
But 2morrow I c change a chance 2 build a new/Built on spirit intent of Heart and ideals based on truth/& tomorrow I wake with second wind & strong because of pride/2 know I fought with all my heart 2 keep my dream alive"

are you ok
see I don't know if you know this but did you know that your parents could go to jail for throwing you out. please respond I just want to know your ok
I also wanted you to know that I'll help ayway possiable

First of all you shouldn't be have sex exspecaily with a guy that is old enough to be your daddy.Second of all the best way to tell her was when you found out that you was pregent.But it probly would be the best way to tell her would to set her down and admit that you was wrong for it and will take rsponbiltly for it.

Your mom needs her ass whopped for throwing you out of the house like that.what you need to do about that since she want to be bogish robb that b*tch when she go to work.Dont give up.And as for that klan sh#@ tell the police that you KKK ass mama kicked you when she found out your daddy was molested you (desperate times cause for desperate measures) While youre at the police station be sure to tell them all about marques dirty ass.If thats not an option for you ,tell mr 24 that if he dont give you money for an abortion that youll tell the police & and his wife.Be sure to call his wife after the fact and let her know what her husband been doing . When you robb your mama house be sure to take a knife youre going to need it sleeping in a park ( and I,d consider going to a shelter) Dont let this keep you down youre only 16 you can get a job and get on your feet if you want this baby.P.S stop screwing period .Dont make the same mistake smarten up. Leave Marques alone.GOOD LUCK!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!

well I also got pregnat at the age og 16 and the guys was 19. the thing is that I told my mother about it and she told my brothers and my brothers told my uncles and their friends the point is that they fucked up the guy real bad. I'm the youngest one in the family and my family is very big. I have 6 brothers and 5 sisters and I have a lot of guys in my family. after that my father called the cops and told them that he got me pregnat and sense I'm under age and he is not ge got put in jail and his family are helping me with the baby they give him what he needs. I also continue school and now I'm in college going for my master. I know its hard to raise a child when you r a child but you should have told your mother and asked her for help you r only human and as a human you r not perfect and you deserve a 2nd chance. I'm just telling you this because I know how you feel and I want to tell you that you can still achive what you want all you need is someone to help u. it does not have to b from your mom seek for help and you'll see. hope you do better now and always learn from mistakes that will only make you a better person. good luck and hopefully you'll reply to my advice

you just need to tell her she might help you then she might not but if she kicks you out you find somewhere to stay and you raise that baby on your own if knowone wants to help and in the end you will think I didn't need anyone to help me I did this on my own I am ready to be a mom you can make a difference just believe and pray for the best every single night Good Luck!!!

sweetie the first thing I could say is....please dont take your babies life. I have 5 children....I cant explain right now but they arent mine. you should come to your mom and sit her down tell her you have something seriuos to tell her and you made a big mistake...then brake it to her. yah she'll get pissed ofcorse she will.....all mothers will. but you made a mistake you need to suffer the punishment.
and all that running your doing could cause a miscarraige...I dont know if thats what you want but just warning u. I hope you can make it thru all this and I wish you luck w/ what ever you plan on doing. dont ever want to c another chick go down,
later!
blondie

ok,its me agian,blondie, and I am very pro-life. I dont know where you r but it sounds like your in like some hic state. like down south. my grand-parents are the head of an adoption thingy up here in washington state. and I am sure they would love to help you w/ what ever. I understand the suicide...anwant to say dont do it.....u are to valuable to b lost. if your parents dont want you o well. you r a very special person and you should never 4get that. sure you have made mistakes,but we all have. and I think you should stop cing that ass-hole whos using u. amber....stop it, you can get thru this...pick your life back up get help from a freind. have the baby,give it up,get a job and go to school.go to a church im sure they can help u.I have faith in you I know you can do it. go get em girl!show the world what your made of! GO KICK SO RACIST ASS GIRL-FRIEND!
blondie

hey amber im sorry about all this! im not really sure what its like to be in your situation you r in, but it seems bad, sleeping in parks, not having much support from parents I mean wow, I cant picture wha its like to be like that and feel really bad for you, just try searching for help im sure you can do it, just try not to miss school b/c without it you wont be in that much success, well I really hope it works out for you and hope you write how it turns out, good luck!

Wow...I actually had some sympathy for you until you told me you slept with this guy again after he told you he didn't want to take responsibility for his unborn child...oh yeah, and he's married. My guess is, you're very naive girl from the backwoods who thought it would be fun and exciting to sleep with an older black man...unfortunately you failed to think about the consequences. It was wrong of your parents to kick you out...very wrong, and I don't know how they can't feel shame.

My advice is, call one of those hotlines, have the child, give it up for adoption, and don't make another stupid mistake like this ever again.

sweetie, I agree with everyone who replied to you. but please answer this... How did you meet him? why did you want to be with him? and what made you think that it was ok? I'm not trying to say anything bad because I dated and older guy too... but I didnt have sex with him. which I am glad I didnt. later I found out he went to school with my older sister who was my age at the time (19) and I was scared she was going to find out because they knew eachother... But I'm glad I dumped him before I did anything stupid or anything bad happend. Just tell your mom before something bad does happen other than you beig pregnant. answer me back please. I want to help you.

you shouldnt let him do that to you especially since your pregnant, you cant be having sex whenur pregnant. why dont you try whatever you can to get back to your parents. Dont you have any family members you can stay with??? I'm sorry thathappend, you cant let him use you.

Listen close to redd05, that's your answer, but Mom will take you back in it called love.

Donot be stupid. I you get pregnant he wouldnot want you or the baby.Please find someone in your age group. Men would say anything to have sex with you. Give it up anhd you will see with your own eyes and tears.

I would contact a care net pregnancy center and talk with them. I know you are having a hard time. I would call your mom and tell her over the phone and just say it and then say come find me when you cool down. I would stay with a friend or relative or call boys and girls town national hotline. I am sorry I cant help you anymore than that. I am so sorry he was married but he will have to pay child support and I know he will come around and so will your mom. It will just take some time. The longer you hide it the harder she will take it.