Realtionship help please for thoes who will take the time to read

I really need someones input on this or maybe I think it will just make me feel better to talk about it...Im in a Online

relationship and we are both 19yrs old…and me her connect so well…and she is really a wonderful girl…and very amazing

and we...

love each other..I have even made plans to go meet her…But the thing that really bugs me to death and eats me alive

is that…She is not a virgin..and iam…and me and her have talked about these things…and she knows that i’m the type of

person that tells everything just how it is…You know? I want all the cards on the table and no secrets…But she told me

things and now im just starting to find out She “Left things out” and then lied about something else…Its things all in her

past..But it still doesn’t matter…It bugs me badly…and I even haven’t kissed a girl yet…And I really don’t think I can cope

with her past..its very hurtful to me…Its not ALLL about the past that bugs me…Its the past..PLUS the fact like lied to me

about it…But she says “Oh I was only afraid to tell you because I knew how upset you where going to get” Its like come

on…I hate being a fool..Few things shes lied about was I asked her about her first time and this was awhile back…and she

was like “Oh well it was with just one guy and it didn’t last very long and he dumped me the next day”
Well I just recently found out that’s a lie…What she said right there LEADS ME TO BELIEVE that she only did it ONCE with one

guy and he dumped her the next day…Well what she “Left out” Is the fact they had sex COUNTLESS TIMES!!! And didn’t break up

with her right away….Then another lie was I asked her how many guys she Fooled around with you know..And she was like “Ohh

just my ex” Witch is the guy she had sex with right…Well come to find out recently again…Its really “FOUR OTHER GUYS” and

has had oral sex with all of them…This shiit really bugs me badly…I feel as if I have gotten cheated on by the past it

really hurts me because now she has waited to tell me these things and lied to me…You got to have Trust and Honesty in a

relationship or shiit’s not going to workout…and please don’t give me the speech “It was her past leave it in her past and

if you really love her you will make things work and bla bla” I don’t want to hear that shiit..Sure its past but it don’t change anything..sure past is past but its easier said then done just to “Forget and move on” something like this I feel as if im on

on American Idol here…Im a virgin and have never been kissed. And she has given her body to sooo many others…How can I

live with this?? I fell like going and playing with 4 other girls then doing one of them Countless times….but I know that’s not the right way to solve this..I tell her I hate being compared to people and judged..knowing she has been with 4 Different dicks…REALLY

gets to me…like REALLLY bad..She tells me she felt really bad after words and she just stopped…But its like..If you feel so bad why the hell suck 3 more if you felt bad about the first one EH??? -_- She says “Oh I thought he was different..Then I thought he was different Etc”…Really don’t know what to believe…Feel like everything outta her mouth now is a lie now….I have been thinking about this non-stop ever scene she told me…Shes really upset that im

upset..But its really bugging me I cant find any happiness in this at all…She says well “I don’t care about sex all I care

about is the love and how well we love one another” But its like…Sure if you don’t like sex so much why the hell do it

Countless fukn times??? “Oh temptation and just caught up in the moment..” Its like you know…jezz…Plus Once your lied

to who’s to say shes will stop lying?? Then she says “I knew you where going to do this I knew it I shouldn’t have said

anything” Witch makes me think she will just keep shiit from me from now on..If she thinks it will upset me…She just wont

say anything…She made me promise I wouldn’t think differently about her once she told me…But you know what I cant help but

DO THINK DIFFERENTLY OF her…When I talk to her or see her on Webcam…I feel shes…Dirty..Tarnished..And it really hurts

me to know shes done that stuff…And I know she will Compare me and judge me…After seeing that many dicks and being with

that many people and doing it THAT Many times…Judging and comparing come with it..I know… and I feel like a HUGEEE Spot

light is on me because I have to live up to 4 other guys…I mean this shiit is hard to deal with and have her think in her

mind if she don’t like it “Wow so in so was better” “Wow so in so had a bigger wang” You know? =/…But she tells me she loves

me so much and for who IAM..and its very nice and charming..but you know it don’t help what has been done…I have never kept

anything from her I have been 110% Honest from the start. I say everything on my mind everything about myself. I keep nothing

left behind. Because whats the point? If they cant like me for WHO IAM what is the point?… I like to have all the cards

out…This is who iam and if you don’t like it. Good Bye you know?…I just really don’t know what to do about this…I Care

about her..But I don’t think I could EVERR!!! Shake the images and thoughts out of my head of her past…and what she has

done…and the fact she lied to me just makes it worse. THIS is what I think…That she is “Done” With having her fun you know? She has had her fun messing with alll those guys and now she wants to find a good guy and settle down with so she finds me and wants to settle down..I don’t know..Im very upset and at a loss for words…and don’t know what to do…This has got to be the Worse

Christmas ever…Someone please help me…Thanks…

k well to tell you from experince, I dated a chick who did about the same thing as she did, and she lied to me also, and I lost my virginity to her.At first things were really good, then later on thing got worsse, she got more jelous, and controling, and was selfish, and all she cared about is sex, and money. Im not saying dont go on with it, but make sure you feel 100% ok with this, because I regret losing my virginity to my ex, and it really does. then if you do lose it to her, you mite get attach to her, and it be hard to leave her, and move on to a better life, you know. If you cant shake the feeling, and images of her past, then dont do it, really dont, cause ull be hurt, and misarble later on, you know. As I like to say there plenty of fish in the water, so keep fishing, and ull find sumone, or they find u, and that im telling you from experience also.

really hope I help out, good luck really, and merry christmas, and a happy quanza

I agree with prince1116

She is obviously after a different type of relationship to u.
If she really wanted it to work she would of gotten everything out in the open.
See if she apologizes and try and work things out.
Its obvious your a very sensitive guy and she should sense that because I definately do.