Please help me and I'm sorry for how long it is!

About a year ago I was dating this guy. Me and him grew up together basically and we lived in the same neighborhood. But he got in a lot of trouble and he had to move so he did. Now a year later I had kinda liked him so we started talking. But then he started playing a little to much. And I new that about him before we started going together. So I was talking to him for like 4 months and becuase I already new him and everything I was having strong feelings for him and everything, but he was 18 and I just 16. But then before we was taing I was having a lot of problems like with my image and how I felt about m self and I was kinda afraid of being in a relationship with him. When dating him I wasnt looking for money or nothing I was just wanting him and thats it. He would certain gestures about money and other things but I never payed it any attention. he's a real popular guy and all the girls like him and he's nice but sometimes he get caught up in bad situation. Me I'm a chubby girl and I dont get boyfriends that often and for me to date him was a big step as for what people would say. he knew before we started dating that I was a quiet girl that never said much and that I really wasnt experinced with being in a realtionship so I never really new what guys want so. Here's how we broked up. One night we were talking and at that time we was talking about his problems that he was having and I was really helping him out and even his parents and sister said they saw a difference in him and how he staying out of trouble and everything. That really made me feel good about trying to stay in a relationship. So but then he started saying things like he didnt want to change and how he feels about me witch was saying I love you but then I was having doubts beause I never loved someone before. I loved being with him. Its just that sometimes when were hugging or holding each other I just get this feeling of that he dont find me attractive and that when he gets to see someone prettier that he'll leave me. So it kinda made things hard and besides everythime we go somewhere together girls would stare and that made me even more uncomfortable with him. But then I really w I loved him. So a week had gone by since we had talked that night and I was thinking about my problems and I new I had a self estteem problem and that it was effecting me being able to love him like I was supossed to. So I decided that I didnt want t hurt him and that wanted to get my self together so I could feel really happy about who I am.I never told him that I had a problem with the way I look and everything. So when I broke up with him I just lied and said that he was playing to much and that he wasnt tryna do better and some other stuff. I never wanted to tell him the real reason because I knew he would try to help, and this was something I need to do on my own so that I can say I did it and be proud besides I didnt want to drag him in my problems. So now a year has gone buy and he has moved on to another relationship with another girl. She's nice and everything but I still have feelings for him and I want to be with him. even though thats how I feel I never will tell him becuse he's in a relationship and it seems that everythin is good with them because they are talking about gettine in engage and everything witch I dont know how thats going to work out. But now we are still talking as frineds though and I always call his ittle sister because were friends. Deep down inside iknow he's realy supossed to be with me.when we talk he sometimes bring up old past stuff that we had.I really dont want no what to do. Should I like forget about him and move on or should I kin wait a little bit more just to see what happen with him ad his girl I really dont no. But I'm really not in a big rush to be in a relationship with any boy I just want to be with the one that still hoding my heart. I really need to now what to do because I miss him and he asked me that like 2 days ago. But should I really feel this way about him its confusing me and I hate the fact that she's loving him and I'm not with I know I ca be a better lady for him I think he knows that to. And now I'm really feeling guilty for lying to him about why I broke up with him.

So can you please help me I really need someone to tell me the truth and who's knows whats its like to be I love with someone.

If he's with someone else and telling you that he still has feelings for you, then he is playing both of you girls.

You need to stay away from him and work on mending your broken heart. There are plenty of fish in the sea (and I know - he's the only "fish" you want but that does fade).

You have a lifetime of broken hearts ahead of you. If you let the first one take you down, you'll never be able to build yourself up. Life is hard, relationships are brutal. Don't waste your life pining over someone who "might" come back.

Um yeah I can relate to you...I know how it feels to like or love someone that already in a relationship... you can't help who you love or who you have feelings for.

if I was in your position I was just speak to him on the phone in person and just tell him the truth on why you broke up with and that you still love him.

honestly if you broke up with him before and he still talking to you on the phone..MAYBE he still has feeling for you

its better to tell him now then not knowing at all if he still have feelings for you

trust me I know its the hardest thing to do, but you got to be brave and just tell him.

I agree with ichi, When I was in high school I was head over heels for this guy who had a girlfriend, we hung out all the time and he was my neighbor, it hurt so much to know that I couldnt be with him. Well he broke up with his girlfriend and we went out once...and nothing ever came of it, we started to fade apart for a while and he started likeing my best friend and still does 5 years later. I got through it slowly, it was hard and its going to be hard for you but you should concentrate on yourself right now, Try surrounding yourself with friends or with a hobby. I rode my horse ALL the time and it was a way for me to just be alone and think, think about the things you like about your life and try to block him out of it, you dont want to be with someone whos going to play you like that, and you trust me you want to be with someone you feel comfortable with. its not worth being with someone thats going to make you feel the way you did when you were with him.