Parents: 16 year old girl, with 25 year old man?

16 year old girl, with 25 year old man?

Let me explain. I've been dating this guy. He's 25, I'm 16. We've been dating since I was 14. My parents don't know this. My parents trust him, with our house and money, but I'm guessing my dad woud shoot him if...

he ever found out. I just want to know, should I tell them? What might happen to my boyfriend if they found out?

Lets get one thing straight. I have NEVER had sex with him. We've made out, slep in the same bed, but thats it

Oh no, here we go again. The he's too old for you argument. Exactly who decides that? And how? And why? And who died and made them God, that they get to decide age gaps for the rest of us?

My Grandfather was 10 years older than my Grandmother, and they stayed married for decades until he died. Our neighbors have a 20 year difference between their ages. Most famously, the famous Bo Derek hooked up with John Derek when she was 16 and he was 46! Yeah, look it up. And guess what? Their marriage lasted 22 years, until he died. Contrast that with all the hook ups / live togthers / marriages between people that are usually only a couple years apart in age, and that crash and burn 65% of the time (ask the Fed. Gov. for that statistic). Hmmm, maybe we should be encouraging older men to pick up younger women, seems the best way to make relationships last.

And test the waters with your parents, they really should know sooner rather than later. Try your mom first, they usually take stuff like this easier than dads. And if they set some rules for you two, so be it, be good for you. But don't sleep with this guy any more, and ease up on the make outs, you're just going to get in trouble. Keep being his girl, then the day after it's legal (to satisfy all the busy bodies around you), marry the dude!

Considering the details you gave - I think your parents must have a hint you two are dating. I mean if he's been around you that long and they trust him with stuff, they must have some sort of idea you're dating each other. They are probley just waiting to hear it from you.

Do they know how old he is?

what is a 25 year old doing with a 16 year old?!?!?! if you tell your parents they can call the cops on him since hes 25 he can go to jail for 9 years this is called statutory rape! your a girl a TEEN hes a man also a ADULT your 9 years apart that's big I know my words will probably go in one ear out the other cause you really like this guy but seriously think about it your 9 years APART that's a BIG age gap

NO NO NO NO NO!! and did I say NO??? It's NOT okay by any stretch of the imagination. And why would you want a grown man that is interested in a child? When you grow up, he's still going to be interested in children. There are issues here that we might not be qualified to help you with. Please find an adult you can trust and confide in them. This is not good!

His dating someone as young as you is the equivalent of you dating a ten year old. Can you imagine yourself making out and sleeping with a ten year old and calling him your boyfriend?

Whatever he tells you, he's not your boyfriend, and what you have isn't a relationship. It's abuse.

im pretty sure they know...and obviously the'd trust him still

First of all, I'm sure that your parents want you to be happy...are you happy with him? if you are happy...then they have noticed that you are happy even if they don't know why...but when they know that you are happy because of this good guy...I think that they shall love him and trust him more...and belive me it doesn't matter how old are you or he is...if you love him and he loves you...then every thing can be good.
I would tell them if I were you...I just need the right time to do that...and start with the nearest parent to you.
Please let me know what happens afterwords

Cheers!

Noor

onnush, that is bad advice. She is dating a child molestor.

 
Please don't take offense, but your username says it all! Maybe you chose that username because, subconsciously, you know that what you are doing is not rational.

in my opinion

 
Ok...so I'm 16 and this guy he's 25 likes me and I like him...Now he's a total sweetie, I like so so so so much...but I don't know if I trust myself...

I saw a post once that said the guy should be half the girl's age plus ten years. That would make your choice to be eighteen years old.

There is a very great difference in the degree of maturity, life experience and goals/desires between a girl of 16 and a man of 25. I'm not saying that it is an impossible relationship but very improbable.

You may be excessively attracted to him because of his perceived maturity whereas he may be attracted to you because of your naiveté.

You have your whole life of many many years ahead of you. Proceed with caution.

Don't be afraid to date boys closer to your own age. They are your peers and will have similar goals and aspirations as you and you are most likely to find Mr. Right in that group.

 
Give yourself a chance. Break it off with him for now. If he is really Mr. Right, he will be waiting for you when, in a couple of years, the time is right and you both have matured into mature consenting adults with a lot more worldly knowledge behind you.

 
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if you love each other, its all that matters, a number doesnt mean anything.

25 and 16 - is disgusting.

I am 26 and to me 16 is a child. There is something wrong with that guy and I would say your in a dangerous situation. I agree with those that stated you are with a child molester and you need to leave pronto.

You are with a child molester. Trust me...and that is what the law would state as well. If he could go to jail for this, it is WRONG!!! A number DOES mean something. Is it worth the risk of him going to jail? If it is then you don't care about him enough to let him go.

So...he was dating a 14 yr old at the age of 23???
At this early stage in your life...no, it's not really a good idea. Sure if you were 21 and he was 30, you might get away with it...and people may not frown upon it as much, but you are not an adult. Even at 21...if you were my daughter...I wouldn't approve of you dating a 30 yr old...definitely not 14 23 or 16 25. At that age if you were dating, even if he was an18 year old boy...it would be better, but I would be concerned as a father.

OKay you say that ya'll been been dating since you was 14 .so while you was 14 he was 23...I think that guy you dating is sick...if you tell your parents he can go to jail . adn if ya'll having sex he can go to jail for statutory rape.

honestly I really dont think you the only girl he dating, why would he date someone under age when he can find plenty of girls his age that can drink, go to clubs and stuff.

someone is gunna find out...good luck

You've been with him for two years. If you had just started dating him, honestly I'd have said it wasnt wise and what type of adult dates children. Personally I still think the situation isnt perfect, but you've been together two years and you havent had sex, so maybe it isnt all that bad. Do not tell your parents. You're right, if it was my kid, I'd shoot the guy. And no they dont secretly know, and no they wouldnt be happy about it. Wait till you're 18 and then tell them. They might not be happy with it then, but you're an adult and they'd probably be a little bit more accepting...

Someone needs to call the cops on that perv

Most 25 year old men would not date someone for 2 years without having sex. So either you are lying and you ARE having sex, or he's seeing someone else behind your back. Either way a recipe for disaster. Run the other way.

If you really love him (seeing as its been two years and you haven't doen anything in terms of sex, so that means he's not pressuring you which means he must be a very pure-at-heart guy), then stay with him.

hey,
You know the saying you cnt help who you fall in love with , well I think this goes perfect with your question.
it does seem wrong but when your 45 and his 55 people wont care I thinks its just cause your 16 that people go into shock - but be careful and make sure he does actually resepect you.And as for your parents it may be hard to telll them but if they find out how happy you r then I don't think they will mind , but make sure you r honestly happy.
Good luck
x

I dont see any problem in it what so ever, age means nothing it's just how long you've been alice for and why should that come in the way of true love? Because you are young and people seem to think when we're this age, we dontk now anything at all, it might be an idea to break it off for a little while but only because it will prove to people that a) you're mature enough and b) he's genuine, but I know first hand how hard that can be so I understand why you might not want to.
I hope it all works out well for you both and you end up happy, please funmail me anything else and tell me what happens!
Thank you
xox

I don't think this is right for a 16 yr old girl have 25 yr old man to me not right and that is illegal girl even if you love him you need to be careful who your going with.