What do you think of my poem?

I don't know any one named sarah but guys feel free to memorize the poem and add yr girlfriends name I would if I wernt single. oh and please be truthful
Can you feel the pain can you feel the sorrow why does it not effect you and only me. why must love be so hard to find why does it hurt. I know everything about love. I know a lot about love I know what love is. I have no clue what love it
Can you help me find love. no wait I have found my love you are my love you are the feeling I have when I see a rainbow when I toch your beautiful skin it makes me tremble tremble all over and when I toch you it makes me know what love is love can be said by your name sarah sarah it is what I say to my garden of roses I say look nice for sarah sarah is coming and they sprout up but when you do not come they die and that is how I feel when you do not come sarah I do not want you to go I want you to stay with me let us be free free as birds in the sky you probably want to know why I love you and I shall tell you beacuse I long to touch your skin and fell that tremble in my blood it makes me feel alive and my heart will always be with you forever sarah let us run away

I like how you used the metaphor of the roses. that was cool. overall, I really like the poem it has great ideas and some of your sentences are very stirring. the only thing that I see is that in some parts you sound a little amature. I think this is because some of the phrases you use don't seem natural. they are kind of jerky, while others are amazingly smooth. example: 'when I toch you it makes me know what love is'. that sentence is really jerky and doesn't flow well because that's not how most people would say it. they might say, 'the touch of your skin forces me to know what love is'. see how that's a little more smooth? anyways, I really like your ideas in this poem. you're off to a great start.

(ps: please don't be offended by my comments. I'm an english majoy and I know how hard it can be to take criticism. I'm only trying to help you and I do genuinly like your thoughts! keep revising! your poem is really coming along!'