My ex-wife wants me back, what should i do?

My ex wife wants me back. First of all, we were married 13 years when she started having an affair with a co-worker. She then left me on February 14th, Taking our 9 yr. old daughter. Our 12 yr. old son wanted nothing to do with her for the next year. We...

had divorced in June of that year and she remarried in August. 6 months later, she promised our son the world, so after Xmas, he moved in with her. I've never forced my children to do anything in this whole situation. I have requested that they make a phone call once in a while and to share time with me also. Well, since all this happened, my relationship with my children has been extremely strained. The only time I hear from them is directly before holidays and birthdays. I try to call them and they blow me off. My daughter has called my bad names and is being influenced by her grandmother, which has a vendetta against me because I no longer trust nor respect her daughter. Therefore, I think my children are being turned against me. 5 months ago, my children started to finally talk and be with me and it was great. Until I found out that my ex-wife left her husband and wanted me back. I told her that it would never happen because I could never trust her. Since that point, my children are back to avoiding me. Incidently, she want back to her husband. Anyways, That was 3 1/2 years ago and my ex wife still wants me back. Why? She says that she made a terrible mistake. I feel I can no longer trust her at all. Is this the only way I'm going to get to see my children? I fear that I may have to take her back in order to finish raising and being with my children. What should I do?

Well, what your wife did that is really a mistake. After several y marriage and with 2 common children wives should not jump into other marriages, this is clear. But I think that you also pushed her aside when she had that affair. Instead of a little understanding, and waiting some time. Such affairs usually are short life adventures. Since you did not write a word on that meantime you also found a woman, I advice you to accept your wife's approach. Forget her mother, mothers in law are usually this type, but I would not marry her again for a while. She should feel the freedom what was so important for her, and also the insecurity that belongs to the freedom.

For the past year, I've lived with my fiance. I didn't start dating until a year after the divorce. The woman I live with is wonderful and I do love her. Here's this chapter's delimina, I still also love my children's mother, but now, I break a heart either way I turn. I can't trust my ex now, and if I could and went back, my fiance would be devestated. On the other hand, if I stay with my fiance, which I truly think is the best thing to do, I won't see my children which will eventually break my heart.

Who do you love? Really love? Forget the power play. Stay with who you really love. Your Fiance' is in for a long hard road with your exwife. She will constantly intimidate her and play games with you. And it will be hard to stay in a marriage with the vindictive exwife causing problems for you and your new wife. Jealousy will kill any relationship. If you marry ...get counseling so you can prepare for the worst yet to come. How do I know? I am in the same situation. The Ex wife will haunt your happiness....if you allow it. If you truly love your Fiance' ...always stand up for her and respect her. She will come first. And deal with your own children. Let the Ex know she will not interfere with your happiness. Be true to yourself. Or you will end up lonely if you chose the wrong future wife.

Check the laws in your State. If there is child support to pay, pay it. Down here one parent is not allowed sole custody. They call it co-parenting and if you want them to be a part of your life fight. Don't say mean things to them about her or her mother! And when the kids say mean things, (listen) thats it. This is not their war and one day they can take that lesson on as their own. As a step-parent sometimes we don't know what we're getting into, so don't forget to spend time with your fiance. And if things start to get crazy remember when their gone who will have your back?

Stay way from her! If I were you, I wouldn't give that bitch the time of day! Obviously you cant trust her. She cheated on you, she turned your kids against you, she's encouraged her mothers vendetta against you. Why would you want to bring the drama back into your life? For your kids sake? She wasn't trustworthy when you were first married to her, she's not going to be the second time around. She's a manipulative bitch, and your kids WILL REALIZE THIS ONE DAY, and they WILL come back to you. In the mean time, do yourself a favor, stay FAR AWAY from her.

i woudlnt be able to trust her either! she hurt you and then she tried to use you as back up. i understan about your children and how you want to be with them, and you should try, if you havent already, to tell you children your side of the story and what she did and how that makes you feel. do what u think will make you happy. sorry if that doesnt help, becuase your in a tough spot good luck!