What if my 15-year-old cousin likes a 52-year-old man?

my because told me she likes a 52 yr old man. I didnt know what to say to her so I am comming here for some advice. let me give you some of the finer points of mine and her convo. the other day about this. she told me that she likes this older man but she doesnt know if he likes her or not. she spends a lot of time alone with him. she wants him to notice her a little more. she says that she wants his attention but doesnt want to do anything with him right now. I dont really know what to say because I sorta like him myself but I dont want to tell him or her that. im 16 and I know that me and her both sound nutz for liking him. but I am concerned about her. she tends to be much more wild than me and I am just in a akward and confusing situation. what do you think I should say or do?

oh I personally dont want to hook up with him. I just think he is a nice looking older man. if he were the same age and was famous would it still be as stange if I thought he was nice looking. I just worry about my because.. no we myflef and because are not related to him he has been a close family friend for as long as I can remember. I am pretty sure he looks at us like grandchildern of his. I just wish I could talk my because out what she wants to do. I do NOT want to hook up with him or be anything more than friends with him, but I am soo worried about my because.

what is a 52 year old doing hanging out with 15 and 16 year old girls? He could get into a lot of trouble if anything does happen.

Umm.. can someone say pedo?! What can POSSIBLY be attractive about a 52 year old man to a 15 and 16 year old!! I mean, Johnny Depp is younger than that, and probably the one and only exception. But seriously.. ask her what is so attractive about him. That's extremely inappropriate. Maybe she's had a bad encounter with an older guy? It sounds strange, but sometimes for someone that young that has been sexually abused by an older man, that's what they desire most. Have a serious chat with her. Also, check yourself! That's really NOT ok.

I agree with the person above me, what IS a 52 year old doing hanging out with teenagers?!?

well we have known him most of our lives. I dont think that he will do anything because he just doesnt seem like the type of older man that would even adknowlage the kind of things my because does for attention. he isnt like that but she trys to be overly nice to him. he is a very attractive older man but I would never tell him that beacuse I would be to embarassed to.

So he's attractive? Not a reason to do anything sexual with anyone, 52 or not. I don't understand, is he family? A family friend? How is he related to you. Just because you don't 'think' he'll do anything doesn't mean he won't. What'shisname never MEANT to harm Jon Benet Ramsey. Of course pedophiles have good intentions, they have desires that want to be fulfilled.

I'm just saying, stop thinking of this guy as a potential hookup. It's disgusting. It's extremely illegal. If you think this guy is a cool dude and a good friend, just see him as that.. don't get him in trouble and possibly never see him again cause he'll be behind bars.

Tell her to do the math. When this guy is 65 y/o, retired, over the hill and shriveled up, she will only be 28 and in her prime. It won't work then. She'll become a nurse maid to him.

Tell her this: 'You're not allowed to pursue that guy until you are 18 years old. It's illegal. If anything happened, he would go to jail. He would be banned from voting, living in certain neighborhoods, and you would never be allowed to see him again.'

This is very serious. You need to get up a lot of courage, and tell her to back off! It's inappropriate and illegal for her to pursue that guy. And you need to educate her before she hurts herself or him.

Good Luck!
Coach Mark

thanks coach mark. this has been really helpful. I kinda needed that little smack to say ' cowgirl up and tell her whats what and why it is the way it is.' I greatly appreciate everyones help and input. I really think this may work =-)

Ok, I figured since I can empathize with your cousin I'd try and see if I could shed some light on her point of view, even though I completely DO NOT support her decision.

When I was 16, I was with a man who was 27. It was one of THE biggest mistakes of my life. He was the second man I had ever had sex with, and to this day I feel disgusted with myself for being with him.

I guess the reason why I did it was because I couldn't relate to people my own age, and I was very very lonely. If I had just had a good friend who I really connected with at that time, I think things would have turned out differently.

age doesnt matter but tell her to wait till she is older enouth for a proper relationship I was 16 and my partner was 30 which aint so much as a big deal I know but as I say age dont mateer longs she waits till she is legal me and my partner are still together and im now 18 and we have a lil girl aswell and I wouldnt b with out any of em