Why doesn't he love me anymore?

Me and my boyfriend have been together for a while now. He told me that he was in love with me in about December and then I realized that I was in love too and everything was good. But now, we talked yesterday and we were being really open with each other and he told me that he doesn’t love, or that he isn’t in love with me. :( I said it was okay and I understood and wasn’t mad but I’m so hurt..I love him now…and he used to always say it first! I never said it first so..why would he lie to me? It’s not about sex because we been active for a while now..why would he do that? And what do I do? Leave..stay…I don’t know..help :’(

Answer #1

Having been through a similar situation myself I came across this Maralyn Monroe quote..

“A wise girl kisses but doesn’t love, listens but doesn’t believe and leaves before she is left.”

In my case, my ex didn’t have the balls to tell me how he felt and instead decided to be distant and behave like a single man so I made the heartbreaking decision to leave him to it.

Unfortunately, there are many men out there who will tell you whatever they think you want to hear so long as it suits them and when it doesn’t and the relationship starts to require a little effort on their part, it’s easier to tell you “I don’t love you anymore” while you’re left wondering…is this my fault? In most cases, absolutely not!

Just men who haven’t learned how to tell the difference between lust and love. The good news is there are plenty of men in the world who DO know how to treat a woman well and will love you how you want and deserve to be loved. Believe that and you’ll open yourself to something better and ultimately more fulfilling.

Answer #2

People love in cycles. Life is like that. That’s why they say you have to ‘work’ on a relationship. Both partners must have a commitment to the relationship to get thru those times when it doesn’t seem to be a love thing. Sometimes you get lucky and find a person who’s ‘cycle’ doesn’t match yours but is willing to stay and work thru. Sometimes you’re not so lucky. But think of it this way - when one door closes, another one opens. Take your love and ‘gift’ it to someone else who needs it, and you.

Answer #3

You need to give him some space to work out what he truly feels. He sounds confused and doesnt no whether he loves you, fair enough, now take a step back and give him some space and time to work himself out and then talk about it.

Answer #4

Yeah it hurts very badly when your boyfriend says he doesn’t love you. Especially after putting so much work and dedication to that person. Well thats what happened to me. We dated for 2 years and he ended up breaking up with me cause he didn’t love me anymore. He used me and all that fun stuff. I am hurting really bad right now. My only question is, how can men do that? one second love you, and the other second wanting to see other people. The only answer I can come up with is that, he never loved me, truly loved me. Now doesn’t that make you wanna punch his lights out lol. I guess thats called life right? Life is hard but its a good lesson to learn

Answer #5

I’m in the exact same position! I have been with my ‘boyfriend’ for over 2 years, at first I was so unconfident but now we are so close he’s my bestest friend.. I’ve even cut out all my friends to always be with him, he used to always say the sweetest thing ever, say the most nicest things do the most romanticest things. now he doesnt seem to care how I feel and is so off when he speaks to me, I cant bare to loose him my whole entire life revolves aaround him! I feel so confused!!!

and to the girl up there ^ its your 21st, why in gods name are you going to go see him if he’s jusst broke your heart! go out and have a good time, and show him that your not bothered even though it may absoloutley kill you inside!

Answer #6

Try not to worry about it too much. Just stay positive if its meant to be it will work its self out. Be distant and he will either realize how lucky he is to have found someone who loves him and wants to be with him!

Answer #7

obviously, this thread was started a long time ago, but I was just browsing for some advice. its my 21st bday next weekend, and my boyfriend broke up with me 2 days ago. im so in love with him, he said he doesnt love me anymore. it was pure bliss for the last over 2yrs, and we know how to work at it, its always been long distance, but since he started uni, he’s been distant with me. im going to see him on my bday, he wants to stay friends with me, said the idea of me not being in his life is too painful, but how do I not break down and beg for him back??? I cant bare the pain right now, my friends are truley there for me, but all I want is him. he is the love of my life, and I cant concieve of ever being with anyone else, it took my 2yrs to fully open up and trust him, and now he rips my heart out… I just dont understand… :’(

Answer #8

I’m Really Sorry to hear that and I’ve just gone through it too my boyfriend told me he loved me and wanted a long relationship and he was 100% Commited but hunni all men are the same he treated me like an idiot and I belived him gave him space and another chance but when you split up its hard to go back and put the trust and love back into someone who has hurt you so much even if you love them you cant trust them well anyways thats just my point of view hope it could help and everything goes ok for you x

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