How to have a real relationship when I'm so untrusting?

Im not sure what to do with myself when it comes to relationships anymore. Im a big flirt I'll be the first to admit that..but my heart has been ripped apart before and because of the hurt , I have no trust , I have commitment issues now because I have no trust because of being hurt. Its a giant circle , and no matter how hard I try.. someone always seems to slip through a crack in my protective wall..

Im obviously not ready for a relationship but I crave the comfort and security that a lover brings..im an oxymoron- I dont know what I want.

Dear italianlday,

I think we've all been there -Being ripped apart by someone who you cared for, and finding it somewhat difficult to trust them again. I know, I've been there, but you can't let this bring you down, no matter what. Forget about the people who you fell for, and broke your heart. I am very sure that they're missing out on a great person, and someday, they'll look back and probaly regret not giving you a chance really.

You have to have a bit more faith in people. You can't automatically think that all the people that you fall for are always going to break your heart. It's not always going to be like that. You have to not worry about being hurt, and hopefully, have a good relationship with someone who you love.

But for now, wait for that special person, who WON'T break your heart and tear you apart. They will come someday. Just don't be too focused on that. My last bit of advice - Try focusing on living your life, and enjoying yourself. Sometimes, when you focus on one thing too much, it will kind of make you go crazy, and I wouldn't want to worry about such a thing.

Good Luck, Danielle