How to get my boyfriend to balance work and us?

ive been going through - probably - the worst time in my life, so far.
especially with my boyfriend. he lost his job a while back -which completely sucked. it was really hard to change our pace of things because he didn't have money. so aside from the...

fact he didn't get me a birthday present NOR do anything for my birthday...or get/do anything for our one year anniversary on the fourth of july...ive been extreamly supportive and i've never complained about his lack of romanticism. i dont even know if thats a word..it is now.
anyway..now hes started this new job almost a month ago...hes finally getting paid. but he literally has NO time for me. not even just me, himself. he goes to work at 530 comes home between 6 and 730. and hes not sitting behind a desk either hes doing physical labor. so obviously hes going to be exhausted. anyway i completely just feel neglected. ive been supporting him as much as i can- but im only so strong. eventually im gonna break and im so scared its gonna be too soon. i dont feel like his girlfriend. i feel like his mother or some sort of maid. i wash his clothes i make sure hes eaten i wake him up..the whole nine yards.
(i cant believe im saying this but...)
even when it comes to sex- im the one who initiates. i give. he takes.
i finally told my boyfriend how i feel. i dont feel like his girlfriend at all.
of course he assumes the worst that i wanna break up
but i don't at all. im actually in love with him and it would be completely stupid for me to let him go. anyway...i made my point that i want whats best for him and if having a girlfriend right now isnt in the mix thats fine. but i'll always be here. its just really a question of balancing work and play. i just guess he hasnt gotten the hang of things.
he hasn't always been this way hes always been interested in me...but right now it seems like he loves me and he wants to be with me but assumes im always gonna be there so he doesn't give me any attention at all. not even an acknowledgment that im doing everything i can to help him .

now that you know the situation..

i don't wanna break up. and i know he doesn't either. so i don't need people giving me advice saying MAYBE YOU NEED SOME TIME APART ...no we don't. because we're not even spending ACTUAL time together to spend any time apart.

how can i help him balance work and our relationship.

PLEASE HELP =[ im breaking down heree

I completely understand your situation. Im kind of in the same. My guy works those same hours doing the same type of work and he is always tired...to tired to pay attention to me and we are breaking down too.

One thing i have come to notice tho...they need their time and space to work things out, and if the girl chases and gives them to much attention, they just assume everything is ok and they dont need to show their girl attention to make her feel special.

I recommend kindly explaining to your man that you dont expect him to not work or anything, you know and understand he is tired all the time. But you just want a little attention to make you feel like you are important to him to and appreciate all the things you do for him. Even if he just says 'come here honey' and gives you a hug, your spirits will be lifted becos he wanted to hug you, his small way of saying he loves you. Let him know you'd appreciate it if he puts in a small amount of effort too.

If he is understanding, give him a chance to prove himself. But if he is to tired to care, then pull away yourself, dont show him as much attention, dont mother him, act like you dont care and do things for yourself instead. And he will start to feel the neglection too and realise this is how you feel and maybe that will trigger him to change his ways a little.

Dear pinkpantiemints,
He has done the right thing by taking a job...this job happens to be one that requires him to work many hours and he is very tired at the end of the day. Here is were being the partner in partners. There is always a time in a relationship that one takes up the slack for the other...this is what a relationship is all about. If you are also working full time and can't get to all the housework...so? It will be waiting. If you just can't stand that then hire someone to help once a week. He comes home late and is tired and I'm sure sore from his day. He jumps in the shower and you have a meal together, you go to bed together, you wake up together...He must have a day or two off during the week...these are the days you plan for your romantic get togethers.
He's tired and is not as ambitious in love making...then say so and don't expect him to preform after a 12 hour day of labour? Keep it for his days off. Welcome to the real world of a hard working family. Time for you to find a hobby if you have free time on your hands.
Sue...good luck

Its a new job, and it'll take some time for him to get used to the physical stress. He's trying to do his part in supporting your relationship. He's NOT intentionally neglecting you, and he DOES want you in his life; where you are, and how you are.

It'll take a few weeks for him to adjust to his new work routine...