How can I cope with my grandma's death?

About two years ago,my Grandma,who I was very close to,past away in the Summer of 2005.Since then,seems as if things haven't been the same.If any of you could relate,losing someone is like,as if there's a part of you missing.

I miss her so much,and in my eyes,she was an amazing woman.She was like,basically a second mother to me.

Sure,since then,I've tried to cope with the fact that she's not here anymore,but every now and then,my Grandma comes back to my mind,as if she died just yesterday.

Everytime,I see someone who looks like her,or someone who has the personality just like her,I have the urge to cry.

So,if any of you have advice on what I should do,please let me know.

It takes a long time to forget somebody. I've lost my grandma recently, as well.

I'm afraid you'll just have to live with an empty spot in your life. I'm not sure if there really is ant possible way on making somebody feel better about somebody dying. Just be happy with the rest of your friends and family who are still alive.

I hope you feel better :-D

I can relate to you because not that long ago I lost my grandpa and I loved him sooo much and for the longest time I was heart broken and would cry all the time because I realized from then on there wouldn't b anymore 'hey Jo' no more calling and saying 'hi grandpa' or 'I love you' but after a while I realized he's in Heaven and he wouldn't want me to be sad he would want me to be happy. so you will probably live the rest of your life like there's a void in your heart but just remember one thing your grandma loves you very very much and I bet she's in heaven watching you everyday and smiling because she's so proud of you. I hope I was of some help

Yes, this is something I can relate to. In 2001, I lost my grandpa. But it didnt stop there. After he passed away, my uncle became depressed and commited suicide. My dad then started to do drugs. And if it wasn't for me being selfish, my grandpa would still be here, my uncle would still be here, and my mom and dad would still be together.

I still am still trying to cope. So, yes I would know how you feel.

Sometimes, I dream about the both of them (my grandpa and uncle) I still ask for forgiveness but I feel like I dont deserve any. When I go out somewhere I feel like I see them, but its just my eyes playing tricks on me.

I would also like to know how to cope with it and move on.
The only thing I can really tell you is maybe tell someone you trust about how you feel and cry. Yes, crying is good. You feel a lot better after it. Just tell someone, you will be suprised on how they can help you.

I agree with julehh. My grandma passed away on x-mas day last year. It's a hard thing to do but sometimes it just takes time. a day, a month ,a year, two years, its all just up to you. I recently had a tough time at my baby shower. I am 9 months pregnant. Before my grandma passed she made all her grand kids and great grand kids baby blankets, but she passed before my daughter will be born. At my baby shower my aunt gave me a baby blanket she made for my daughter with my grandma's crochet needle. I cried because it was sweet, but instead of being depressed because my grandma couldn't be there to make it, I was happy that it was made with something of hers. I guess what I'm trying to say is that sometimes you have to make an effort to celebrate the good times and your grandma's life and not life in the memory of her passing. It takes work and it's hard but know you grandma is there with you and know that she taught you well.

Trying to forget some one you love is like trying to remember some one who never existed it just doesn't happen. You never forget them..not now or ever..the pain enver really goes away..you kow how they always say that times heals all..well it is not that times heals it but that in time you will learn how to deal with it where it causes you less pain then it does now..I lost my father three years ago..and it is still very hard at times...most of my family is doing a lot better now mostly because they are Christian and new that my Father was and is saved..although he is dead the bible says he is absent from the body and present witht the Lord. Our Faith has really pulled them through...I was not saved at the time and have oly been saved for a year..it was his Death that finally saved me. Sad but true.

I'll get really sad at times..where as others I am just fine. It all depends though. I have noticed that people who live full lives and are a lot more busy have less time to morn and free time to dwell on it...My family members are a lot more active per say in life then I am..most have childernand job that take up all their time..and so they do not find them selfves thinking of him nearly as offten as I do.

My life is full yes, but not as busy as theirs..I work on and off for a really great lady..and I am starting school ( College) in January. I do not have a family of my own nor do I even live with mine..and SO I HAVE a lot more FREE TIME..then any of them do and that is when I think about him the most in my free time when my mind is on rest per say.

I think that you will notice that too a long with what I call 'trigers' which are basicly things that really remind you of her...and make you sad.

The great thing about emotions though are that e allow are selves to feel them and for how long is ultimitly up to us..you can allow your self to get as sad and depressed as you wont or you can pick your self back up.. whatever you do, do the choice is your an yours alone.

The pain becomes easier with time...and believe me it takes time.

Every thing that you are feeling though is normal.

Feel free to contact me if you feel as though I could be of further help.
Take care of your self though.

Dear modernwinterbreeze,

I am so sorry for your loss. I know how you feel. My Grandmother just celebrated her 100th birthday on 5 December2007. For the most part, she raised me, and has been there for me all of my life. We are very close. There have been times in the past we thought she was all but gone, but here she is, at 100. I think I'll die when she does.

I lost a dear friend, Darlene, last April (2007). She was my Dad's age, 67. I had met her through my wife. We had known each other for only a short ten years. We were so much alike in so many ways. I have been doing ok, except now, Christmas eve, I am grieving again.

From this experience, I would advise you to get in touch with your Minister/Pastor or someone from your church. That has helped me a lot. Read the Bible. Light a candle for your Grandma. Make a Christmas ornament for your Grandma. Make a scrapbook of you and your Grandma. LET YOURSELF CRY. LET YOURSELF GRIEVE. Be with others who lift you in spirit.

Keep a nice sized (8X10) framed portrait of your Grandmother on your desk, nightstand, or where you will see her several times a day. Your Grandma is still with you even though you cannot see her.

The world wide web has also been a wonderful resource for me. Check out these web sites I have found helpful... (just a few)

http://www.annieshomepage.com/copelong.html

http://www.christianitytoday.com/tc/2003/006/8.58.html

http://dying.about.com/gi/dynamic/offsite.htm?zi=1/XJ&sdn=dying&cdn=health&tm=153&f=21&su=p284.7.420.ip_p284.5.420.ip_&tt=13&bt=0&bts=1&zu=http%3A//www.gratefulness.org/candles/enter.cfm%3Fl%3Deng%26gi%3Dddb%26p%3DLighting%2520a%2520candle%2520is%2520a%2520sacred%2520ritual%2520in%2520many%2520different%2520traditions%2520and%2520religions%253B%2520it%2520is%2520a%2520way%2520of%2520remembering%2520a%2520way%2520of%2520healing%2520and%2520a%2520way%2520of%2520bringing%2520hope.%2520A%2520solitary%2520candle%2520brings%2520light%2520to%2520the%2520darkness%2520and%2520serves%2520as%2520a%2520reminder%2520of%2520the%2520power%2520of%2520the%2520human%2520spirit.%2520The%2520flickering%2520flame%2520ignites%2520something%2520deep%2520inside%2520us%2520that%2520connects%2520us%2520to%2520each%2520other.%2520As%2520Erasmus%2520noted%2520if%2520we%2520give%2520light%252C%2520and%2520share%2520light%2520we%2520can%2520watch%2520the%2520darkness%2520disappear.%250A%250AYou%2520are%2520invited%2520to%2520light%2520a%2520candle%2520to%2520remember%2520a%2520loved%2520one%252C%2520a%2520past%2520relationship%252C%2520a%2520cherished%2520pet%252C%2520or%2520whatever%2520other%2520significant%2520loss%2520or%2520losses%2520that%2520you%2520may%2520currently%2520be%2520experiencing.%2520Begin%2520by%2520taking%2520a%2520moment%2520to%2520slow%2520down%252C%2520focus%2520on%2520your%2520intention%2520and%2520decide%2520the%2520reason%2520you%2520are%2520lighting%2520your%2520candle.%2520You%2520will%2520be%2520guided%2520step%2520by%2520step%2520through%2520the%2520candle%2520lighting%2520process.%2520%250A

http://judaism.about.com/od/deathandmourning/f/yahrzeit_how.htm

http://dying.about.com/od/rememberingthedead/qt/light_candle.htm

http://dying.about.com/od/livingafteradeath/Living_On_After_a_Death_Resources_for_Survivors.htm

http://www.grieflossrecovery.com/grief-memoirs/gallup01.html

http://dying.about.com/od/rememberingthedead/qt/empty_chair.htm

http://depression.about.com/od/griefcomfort/a/holidaygrief.htm

http://dying.about.com/od/rememberingthedead/ht/remembering.htm

If you helped your Grandmother make things like quilts, embordry, ect; indulge yourself in doing those things.

I hope I have helped. God Bless you - Merry Christmas

Jamie