How do i stop seeking approval

It's been so long since I've really been with my ex, but I've never really gotten over him. He treated me with so much disrespect, yet, I yearn so badly for him to treat me differently, and for him to realize that I'm the coolest girl ever. I still...

believe that if we didn't go to different schools things would be different between us--he'd think of me differently because after our rocky relationship, and countless fights, things weren't so tension free. We never really had a chance to make up completely. I want him to like me so badly--to want to hang out with me, to want to talk to me. I miss him like crazy. But the thing is, he treated me with so much disrespect, that I know I shouldn't be feeling this way. I've stopped doing things like this, out of respect for myself, but I still want to so badly-- and even if my actions no longer show that I love him more than I respect myself, my thoughts do. We're in the same social circle and he basically lives with my best friend who he's becoming really close with. Recently, they were in a best kiss photo together, which was blown off as a joke, and they both made it seem that it was stupid that I was getting upset about it. Thoughts about him haunt me-- I try to stay busy, meet new friends-- do all the things you're supposed to do when you're trying to get over someone, but it just doesn't seem to be working. I want to know if there will ever be an end to this. I'm completely aware of how irrational my feelings are-- I realize how completely pathetic this is. Just get over the situation, get over him. But I just can't get over the things I allowed him to get away with.. The countless things I forgave him for.. The things I did out of anger. I just want his approval so badly. I don't know why, and I'm worried that when I walk down the aisle in 10 years, I'm going to be thinking about him. And I'm so so so so worried that he's going to end up with my best friend, who he's always said reminds him so much of me. I think the root of the problem is that I need his approval so badly. I need him to want me, to like me, to think I'm cool, especially when he's at school hanging out with all my best friends. I feel left out. I want this to be over. I guess I'd like to know how I can stop trying to seek his approval. It's like everything I do is for him. Will he like this about me.. Will he like if I do this... But really he doesn't even notice.

He sounds like a loser and you deserve someone that's going to treat you with the respect you deserve.
Any guy that acts like that towards you is a waste of time. It's so hard to get over your ex, but I'm sure you're strong and you'll find someone better...
Next time you should try and shorten it a little bit so more people will read it.

he treated you ike crap and as moe said, you deserve better
hes not going to change, so theres no use getting your hopes high thinking that it will work out if you can change him, because you cant
and a good relationship doesnt happnen because you had to change the other person
they should be right for you in the first place
while it is your life and your choice a lot of pain could be saved if you realise that hes not worth it and you can do a lot better