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1) http://upload.wikimedia.org/wikipedia/commons/3/31/Illu_female_genitalia.jpg
check this to see what is what and where all the stuff is
You always try to go for the clit. It's the most sensitive spot on a female's body. Watch some porn so you can get an idea of how to do it. All girls are different and they all like it a different way - slower or faster ,etc.
2)It hurts her cause it's probably one of her first times. The vagina is a muscle and for sure the first few times it will hurt her. Try to go slower on her, so she doesn't feel any pain. If you're fingering, go with 1 finger, then slowly go to 2. Next time if she's ok with it try 3 or w/e you think is best.
Good luck
well since shes a vergin you should mas*erba*e her not finger her lol like just put your middle finget on the clit which is at the top and move it in a circular mothion. try to spread out her sides (.'.) look where the apostraphyu is thats where the clit is lol so try to spread out the sides and softly with middle finger with a circular motion mas*urba*e her. dont finger her bro
yea yea I did a little of both but only the fingering thing because (1) she asked me to and (2) it was dark, under the blanket while we were watching a movie and I couldn't and didnt know how to find it at the time, inexperience tends to do that to ya lol thanks though, good to know 
Why did it hurt when I touched her?
It's relatively obvious how you do it, and tonight for the first time ever for me and the first time ever for someone other than herself doing it, I fingered my girlfriend right? Ok well now here are 2 questions.
1.) Are there any 'sweet' spots to go for? Where's the clit? What's the best 'technique?' Questions like that.
2.) I asked her if it felt better or worse than when she does it herself and she just said eh it feels good but it's starting to hurt, so I backed of, why would it hurt? Did I do something wrong? If it hurts is it normal because it's more intense and should I continue a little bit more past her initial ouch just a little to get her used to things because I heard people say that real sex hurts the first few times so Is it the same thing here or what?
Help me please
gracias