Fantasy of mine part 2

Ok so remember a week ago or less I posted the fantasy of being with an older man...well oppurtunity has showed itself and its kinda screwed up. Its my boyfriends brother...my brother is adopted and he has an older brother who has taken quite an interst...

in me and he is 44 ...hes very goodlooking .I thought he was goodlooking and liked him before he ever told me that he liked me . Its sooo screwed up but its now obvious to me that I dont care about my boyfriend that much if im even considering this. Im only 19 and havent explored life enough to settle down I think.. The most screwed up part of all this is that my boyfriend and his brother are very close and dont know why either of us are considering this...and im very close to his family and that would be the worst because its not like im just cheating on him with some random guy its his brother and makes me even more terrible and even if I broke up with my boyfriend to be with him that would screw up their whole family which is close-knit. I dont know what to do because I actually like him and to top it off his daughter is my age and were friends its the most screwed up thing I have ever been involved in ...this is like the next jerry springer episode waiting to happen ...theres not much to advise me on but what im looking for is someone who has been in this type of situation so please help - dani

hmmm well see my neighbor, he's 42 and he dates girls age 19 to 23... he's pretty good looking but kinda messed up like he is a total party animal and pretty foul with a 4 year old daughter.. a lot of people will probably look down upon it but if you really like him give it a shot... try to let your boyfriend down easy although thats probably not going to happen or be easy, at all... just look out for any red flags in the older guy incase he turns out to be a nut job

The his daughter is my age part was really the icing on the cake. Maybe his daughter can start going out with your boyfriend since he's adopted and all. Then everything will be wrapped up in a nice little bow.

This is a situation wherein you're going to have to accept the fact that if you move forward with this, you're going to be hurting a lot of people in order to get what you want, and I agree with maddillyn -- the reason a lot of older men date younger women (besides the obvious) is that women their own age have examined and rejected them for one reason or another. As you grow and mature, you might find that you're outpacing the emotional growth of your new older beau.

I rethought what I told you earlier. just dont even go there. save yourself the trauma. obviously I didnt read that all the way thru...his daughter is your age and your friends with her. dont do it,

you guys are def. rite because no matter what theres going to be catch somehow and I really dont want to screw it up the best thing for me to do is let that pass on by and if im really not happy with my boyfriend I can break up with him and find somebody else thank you both so much and ill keep ya posted on what happens.

-dani