Does he still want me?

I've been with my boyfriend for about five months now and in the beginning we were so happy, txtin all the time always wanting to be together etc. Now its like am not there he hardly wants to see me we're always fighting. It's just so different. I spoke to him a couple of times about this and he says he still loves me and wants to be with me, but I don't understand why he's treating me like this? I want to know how to make everything right again.

The beginning of a relationship is always a mixture of tremendous emotions, overwhelming feelings, the sense that you have to always talk to or be with that person because they make you feel so GREAT! (Trust me - I'm 36 and have had my fair share of relationships - the patterns are always the same). The beginning is like a high, and in order to maintain that high, you have to maintain that constant level of emotions...you can't live that way for long periods of time! (you'd never eat or sleep or concentrate!) So, eventually things subside and you come down from the clouds. What is left there is sometimes not what you thought it was, which sounds like where you're at. You two may love each other, because you shared that initial excitement and THAT is what you based your love on. A true relationship will come down from that place and land softly on the pillow of trust, companionship and communication that should have been build up first. You two never did that, and that's why you're fighting. You CAN take a step back and begin to build a new foundation - but don't expect it will ever be as strong as it was in the beginning. It won't be. And if you think back - you wouldn't want to feel that high all the time.

Good luck to you both - if it doesn't work out, embrace the good memories and know that you'll have it again someday with someone new. It's not the end of the world, only the beginning of a new one. And now you have some great experience to draw on. Build a trust foundation first, then let your heart soar.

Meg :-)

Dear dml20,
Sometimes people get scared in a relationship. If you've been seeing each other a lot during these five months and you both are quite serious about this relationship the next step might be a more permanent commitment. Thoughts like do I want to be with this person forever? Could I live with this person? Could I have children with this person etc. What do I give up, what do I gain. So the obvious is to sit down with you boyfriend and ask him why he is being distant. You may not like some of the answers he gives you and you may be having doubts yourself. There may be a problem here and best to know now than when the more permanent commitment happens. Talking at this stage can open the door to great communication later on if you both decide to take your relationship a step further.
Sue...good luck