Do i have an eating disorder?

I know that might sound like a stupid question - do I have an eating disorder? - but I'm really confused. I've always had a negative body image, the earliest I can remember is when I was 5 my friend always looked better than me and I always got really...

upset becasue I wanted to look like her. In fact, Ever since then, I've thought someone looked better than me. But I loved food and it wasnt until I was about 12 that I started to diet seriously. I only lost 20lbs and was quite happy, so happy I stopped dieting and piled the weight back on. Then I got very depressed and just had no appetite. I dont know how much I lost but it was enough for my clothes not to fit. My mum started noticing and threatening to take me to the doctors, and I got a bit happier so I started eating again, and agian piled the weight back on. Now I am 16 and have recently lost 14lbs, but I think it's getting out of control. I'm using weight watchers points to measure my intake. I'm supposed to have 18-20 points a day, and at first I was having 18, then I started having 16, then 13, now I aim for 10, which is very hard when my mum has already threatened to take me to the doctors a few times, saying im becoming obsessive. But I tihnk you have to be obsessive to a certain extent - you have to measure everything and count what you eat otherwise you dont know how much you're actually eating so you dont know how much you have eaten that day. I just want to be skinny. I dont care if I have to be cold or tired or ill all the time, those things seem like a small sacrifice if I am finally going to be thin. I cant see what else I could possibly want if I was thin.. but I'm not. And I cant stop myself thinking about it. I've been self harming since I was about 8, and I do it when I eat too much becasue I hate myself for it. I never really considered I might have an eating disorder until all the talk about size 0 recently. But when I thought about it, I realised I have actually hated the way I look most of my life. Being really honest, I dont think I have an eating disorder. Sometimes I love food. And I've never made myself sick, though I have tried to, I've always chickened out. So, you know the facts, what do you tihnk?

you dont sound anorexic. But you do have low self-esteem. I used to. But I just didn't care what people thought of me anymore. I just excercise and eat healthy. If people don't like the way you look they are not worth it. Just don't be so hard on yourself.

how ya doin,
It doesn't sound like an eating disorder. I think you're just a regular teenage girl who wants to look good. You talked about wanting to look like someone that looks better than you. Sweety , there will always be someone skinnier, smarter, prettier, popular, etc., but you don't need to feel down about that. So you want to look good, and count some calories and what not, i know a lot of people that do that, and there is nothing wrong with that unless you over do it. I don't think counting 10 is unhealthy. You have to commit to a balanced routine it and stick to it, eat healthy, and exercise constantly until you're satisfied, but keep eating healthy, thats the reason why you keep packing up the weight again, because you stop not necessarily dieting but eating healthy. Starting to be self conscious at the age of 8 is not normal. Try seeing your school counselor or someone you might know that can be of help, even me if you're not comfortable talking to your peers about this, feel free to give me an email if you want to continue talking. You said it's a small price to pay to look thin. That is the worst thing you could possibly tell yourself, because before you know it, you will be trying ANYTHING to reach that stage.

I hope i helped, good luck and feel free to leave me a message.

-Luis-

i am going through the same thing and i've come to the point where i just want to be me.Doesn,t matter if i'm thin fat or what ever i don't need to prove anything and thats what you need to do start liking yourself for who you are not what other people are because no matter how much you try it never happens so just be you.

It doesn't sound like an eating disorder but if your a size 0 do you really need to be thinking about your weight? No you dont! Your as thin as it gets and you should be proud of your body. I go through the same thing as I think I'm larger even if I am a size 0. But I have a great technique for staying at a healthy weight but appearing slimmer. Search google for flat abs and sites will come up with ideas on how to keep your stomach flat. Breathing techniques (no matter how dumb they sound) work too! Also drink lots of water and do not limit your diet!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!
This is what works for me, good luck!