Cousins..in love?

Okay..I'm thirteen years old and I have very strong feelings for my 17 year old cousin. Yes, he's my first cousin, and I know a lot of people will say it's wrong but I really can't help these feelings. We didn't see, nor talk to each other for at least...

6 years, or so, and the first day we hung out we instantly clicked. I don't know if I have these feelings, as I put it, because he's my family, or if I actually am falling for him. ALso don't tell me I'm too young to know what love is, because I'm not. I know how I feel and you don't.
My heart doesn't just revolve around one person if it wasn't more than a simple crush, or whatever you guys say. So, please, don't say anything like that. And another thing,
Don't tell me to focus on someone else, I can't do that. I've tried, and it don't work.

Please don't be rude to me about this, I'm just very confused and need some advice.

What do I do?! Do I tell him about this, or not.

Because if I don't tell him, maybe I'm losing out on something, but if I do tell him I could lose him.

I don't know what to do. Please help.

THanks.

Hmm.. To tell a 17 year old male that a 13 year old female is in love with him, that would be rare for the male to agree with that feeling.

I don't 100% think incest is wrong, my 10th grade teacher's parents were cousins and she was very normal and a lot of students liked her. These days guys at those ages of 17 or whatever tend to look for slightly older or younger females, maybe you should tell him so you don't stress yourself out, but make sure he keeps it a secret, a lot of parents HATE incest with cousins because that means their brother/sister is even more family then they may want to be. Be careful about this, he's much older than you, and you seem like a smart girl, so you should think about it for a while. I would say tell him when you got him alone and he can keep a secret very well. Good luck.

- Gothik

just do what I do when I can't help but love some one no matter how hard I try just don't talk or see them for a while and then when you do and even before you do just think to your self hes older he would be much more happier with out me I could be jeopardizing our friendship and then possibly never see him again say I would rather be with him as a friend then not be with him at all Oh and all so your title shouldn't be cousins in love cause you don't know if he loves you like that

Hey, I've been through the exact same thing. it turnd out for me that he felt the same. Same as with you there was an age difference of 4 years. from what youv said you feel strongly about him, so my advice is to just tell him how you feel, or you may always be thinkings 'what if'?

well i liked one of my cousin and i had to stop but i dont see ne thing wrong wit wat i waz goin through but it is wrong for ur first cuzz i liked my 4th cuzz

Oh...my...God.
I'm 13, and I have exactly the same problem. I'm in love with my 17- year old cousin. I know what you're feeling. I want to tell him, but I just can't. He won't be able to accept it, and I fear it won't ever work out for us and that I might lose him too. But yes, it's not just some passing crush or feeling like that. It's love, and nothing will change that.

Hope it works out for you.

hey
im 13 too and in love with my first cousin.
he's only a year older than me. we both feel the same way, which I can tell due to da fact that we spend all of our family time together, usually feeling each other up. I know it sound rong, but it doesnt feel wrong at the time. I sometimes imagine what my friends and other family would think and it's not nice. I dont know what to do. help?

wb x

Lolz nasty. But if he wants it and you want it , then I don't care just like I don't care if GAYs marry gays .
As long as your happy then keep doing what you do, LOve is love at the end of the day. You should tell him how you feel

Thats exactly how I am but my cousin is 16 and im like completely in love with him.
We have known each other since we were like 4.
And well I dont exactly know how to tell him or how he will take it...

I'm like sooo experienced in this subject. Beleive it or not, I used to have a crush on my cousin also. BUT im 13 and he's 19. I'm not going to be mean or say your to young, but I will say, TELL HIM. You WILL fell better afterwards I promise. I told my cousin about the way I felt about him and no, we didnt hook up but we talked for like 3 hours and now we are really close. He is one of my best friends. I'm really glad I could help someone in this subject. I hope I helped.

I understand I used to have the same problem ... actually in my culture its normal for cousins to marry even though nowadays some think its outdated. Anyways I had a huge crush on my cousin while I was visiting my country but got over him when I left. I am not telling you to get over him or anything and I'm not telling you to go for it ... just do what you feel is right in your heart. I do know people that are married to their cousins and even have kids so it can works out sometime. I don't know where you're from or if in your culture marrying your cousin is accepted so I don't know how your parents or other family members would react. The most important question is ... does he feel the same way? If he feels the same way for you and you know it then go for it ... but remember you are only 13 and you are still young. Maybe you should just wait it out till youre both older. You're too young to be in a relationship...sorry thats just my opinion ... who has a real relationship at that age? Remember the age difference... when you're 14 he'll be 18 and thats illegal ... so my best advice is to just wait you still have lots of time ... who knows maybe you'll end up together or maybe you'll find someone you like even better ... just dont be in any kind of rush or anything I hope it works out for the best! And don't care what people think it only matters what you think! Good luck!

i know how you feel. i am 13 and in love with my 15 year old cousin. he doenst know i love him but i can never get him off of my mind. just like you. i havent told him i love him, i want to but i know it would just be weird because i know he doesnt love me. i would just suggest telling him that he means a lot to you, not that you LOVE him but that you like him a lot and he means more than a cousin to you.

Being cousins makes things difficult. But, lay out the facts.
You are 13, you have years to find someone better who is more amazing.
Can you honestly see yourself marrying him?
You are blood related.
How would your family or him react to this?
He is nearly an adult, you are barely a teenager.
You aren't doing anything wrong! But this is not a relationship worth pursuing.
Tell someone you know and trust and get their opinion as well.

Good Luck Sweetie

I do not think you should tell him anything becos your right you will risk losing him. Fair enough you have feelings for him, but at the end of the day he is your cousin, you just need to give yourself time and ride it out. eventually these feelings will go, you are young, so give yourself some time and it will go away. He is a 17 yr old boy, he to ,may be a lil more mature than you, but he is still a baby like yourself, he will have no idea how to handle something like this so you will only make his life very complicated, so to save everyone drama id say keep it to yourself.

the problem is you wont allow yourself to. you know what I mean.. you're aware that its wrong and your young like you just said but as I can see it, the important thing for you is your feelings. dont dwell so much on him, or your feelings for him.. you'll know it...

I know how you feel. I too have the same problem. I had stopped seeing my first cousin for eight years and when I did see he him again we both felt a close bond for each other. We only spent two days together and in those two days he confessed his feelings for me. I'm 16 and he is 21. I too have those feelings for him and I know that those two days were amazing. Of course we weren't ready to tell our parents nor are we yet so we had to hide showing our affection for eachother when our parents were around. Many don't understand but I know that what I feel for my cousin is real and hopefully one day we will be togther without having to hide it from our parents nor from the rest of the world for it seems to be taboo to most. I say follow your heart and see how he feels about you. You would regret it more if you never sayed anything. good luck and hope things turn out well for you.

This might be too late, but...I'm 25 and my cousin (who is a few days older) and I fell in love...madly in love, and we just stopped talking maybe 2 days ago. We went out for 4 months, attempted to breakup 4 times. I was willing to turn my back on everyone for her. I love her so much, and still do. However, my mom freaked out when she found out and suggested to me that she would kill herself if our (1st) cousin relationship would never stop. Knowing that my mom was in distress tore me apart. My x-cousin-girlfriend and I had kept things secret for about 3 months, until my mom found a love letter in my room. So we came out of the closet about it. Note, I haven't seen my cousin for 15+ years until last DEC, and when we finally reunited, we were close friends, and when on vacation one time, we just experimented and just got hooked. I can easily say, after years of dating, that she has been the perfect girlfriend, in all way, except genetically. MY ADVICE: if you are serious about this, then be prepared to turn your back on everybody, on society, your friends, your family, and make sure that he (cousin) does the same. Only few people can truly fight the strong currents of society and be successful--but fight will be very difficult. Now that we have broken up, I feel excommunicated from friends and family, and I cry everyday in isolation, for if my secret was to come out, more that it has already, then I would be totally excommunicated from society. Make sure you know what your doing.

well im in love wid my cousin too she 13 (so am I ) I've known her for all my life and I just cant foret her (I tried by moving out for 3 years but it didnt work). could you tell me what signs there are that I could know she loves me too??
I think you should telll him you love him. nothing bad could happen.

Hi. I know exactly how you feel i'm 14 and i'm head over heels in love with my 18 year old first cousin and we hadnt seen each other for eight years so we just clicked.i've been looking for someone who knows how i feel and i dont know what to do either but maybe we can help each other and come witha solution...

Sandie

Well I dont think we can help who we fall in love wit. I mean to tell you the truth when I was about 11 I liked my cousin 2. But then I seen he was my cousin and yes Im going to find a guy I like that isnt my cousin. But maybe it is different for you. I dunno rly. Im just prtty sure u will find a guy you like that isnt ur cousin cause for all u know u could find a guy that is just like ur cousin that u might like even more.

Feelings are fine, relationships get a little weird but not out of the ordinary between cousins. Children, however, can be a problem. The reason why it is such a taboo for first cousins or immediate family members to have relationships is because any children they might have are at an extremely high risk for blood disorders, mental disabilities, and other genetic weirdness. So you can really never have children without a world that will attach a stigma to the children or risk having a child that might not be able to enjoy life like its parents. You are 13 and maybe one day you will want kids of your own. This relationship would be a timebomb for those expectations. Not to mention the changes you will go through in the next 5+ years...... Don't jump into this without weighing all of the risks first.

I know EXACTLY how you feel! I also like my cousin!! Although, i just met him for the first time in eight years a few months ago! But he also has these feelings towards me. I know it is weird but you cant help who you really LIKE OR HAVE STRONG FEELINGS FOR.