How do I deal with this controlling boyfriend?

what do I do when I have a controlling boyfriend.. I dont know what to do anymore, my boyfriend gets mad at me over nothing.. he gets mad if I dont want to have s*x with him he gets mad if I dont leave my house at a time that he wants me to, he gets mad if I want to hang out with my friends, he always brings up my past relationships but gets mad if I say something about them, he always says little self pitty comments to try to make me feel bad, hes always talking about s*x and how much he wants to do me but I hate that because it makes me feel like crap.. he lies to his friends about me. like a few days ago I tried to break up with him but that only lasted like 20 mins because he continued to call me and text me till I gave in but he told his friends that he broke up with me and that I begged for him to take me back.. and all this other crap, he got mad at me today because I didnt come over right away after work that I went home to see my family because my sister came home and then he hangs up on me.. he always says I treat him like crap, he always says that im being a b*tch and that I dont change and that I dont try in the relationship anymore.. he is just really annoying to me now.. and I think he starts fights because he likes to get me mad and im not the only one that sees that his best friend said that he even said that.. then he gets mad at me because I was honest with him and I told him that I might be leaving next june to go away for college.. but im suppose to be ok wtih him leaving at the end of this august to go in the freakin navy.. and that im suppose to move out with him when hes done with bootcamp.. noone of my family likes him.. my best friend told me to break up wth him.. hes on my cousin's sh*t list.. my friends dont like him his own best friend said that he treats me like sh*t.. I just dont know why I stay with him.. what do I do.. please help

Hun>read your post again, its right there in black and white. Not once did you have anything good to say about him. Your family, and friends dont like him, his best friend has commented on how bad he treats you, and you dont know what to do? For one thing, he treats you bad, because you let him. Guys like this have a very low self esteem!

The basic qualities of a healthy, loving relationship include:
respect
trust
honesty
fairness
equality
good communication

Emotional abuse is when your boyfriend puts you down, ignores you or calls you names. It may be about what you are wearing, or how you're acting. They may want you to stop spending time with your friends and question you on every detail of what you've done without them. They may use jealousy or anger to intimidate you or to control your behaviour, or might deliberately humiliate you in front of others. They might try to manipulate you and make you feel wrong, inadequate or like you're crazy. Another form of emotional abuse is if they threaten to hurt themselves or other people if you break up with them. Emotional abuse can be just as damaging as physical abuse.

.Signs of Emotional Abusers:
*Emotional abusers expect more from their partners than they are willing to put into the relationship. The problem is no matter how much the partner gives, it will never be enough, and the abuser will expect more-because the relationship isnt about love for the abuser, its about CONTROL.
*The abuser says its not completely his fault. That you pushed his buttons or did something to trigger him
* Emotional abusers have huge double standards. What is ok for him them, is not ok for their partners. They are allowed to get angry-their partners are not
*The emotional abuser often plays pushme-pullyou. He will indicate that his partner is waning, and when she begins to start separating from him, he will become attentive, and interested again. He may even use sex as a weapon against her.
*Abusers are self-centered. They blame other people, and seldom take responsibility for their own actions.
*Abusers are self-righteous. They find ways to justify their behavior. As a result, he always focuses on HER problems, and insist SHE change to make the relationship better
*Emotional abusers hate apology-and if they do apologize, they will only do it again. If you do get an apology out of an abuser it is a quick fix,not a long term solution, because they will do the same behavior over again.
*Emotional abusers often grow old without growing up. They are emotionally stunted, and immature

You have to wake up to the fact that he 'does not love you', and probably never hasnt loved you for a long time, if ever! Because the truth of the matter is...someone who can be emotionally cruel, malicious, compassionless w/someone who has given their love to, is so self absorbed in self hate that he is incapable of loving himself much less anyone else. What the abuser feels is obsession, not love!

People who love you will treat you w/respect, consideration, courtesy, honesty, and compassion.

The sooner you wake up to the fact that the relationship is unhealthy, and move on, the sooner your life will improve!

Good Luck!

Your situation sounds kinda like what I just went through. Trust me, no matter what people say, its a hell of a lot easier said than done...but I will tell you, it only progresses. It only gets worse. My boyfriend was way way nice to me at first, started getting a bit jealous, then wanted me to not have certain friends or talk on the phone, it just progressed more and more til he could have me all to himself. He was a little mean and would just call me names when we would fight, then one time he punched me while I was holding my daughter, it just went on from there...I was scared, I truly thought that he was my soul mate. I loved him more than anything. Just a month ago, I had to end it, I had to give up because he almost killed me, beat the crap out of me and choked me almost to death. Why? All because he thought that I was keeping something from him and I kept 'lying'. Well I have found out that he was the liar...our entire relationship was built on lies...manipulation, control. No matter how much control he has, it will never be enough. Just think about it. I still love him. I still find myself wanting to be with him...but I know that I can't. Absolutely not. I'm not saying that this is going to happen to you, but how do you know it won't? I thought that he would never hurt me like that. But...he did! Think about leaving before its too late...Love shouldn't make you feel the way you do...True love is not being controlled and lied to and accusing...Love is beautiful.

This sounds like what I've recently went through. I asked a question about my boyfriend, and this girl told me he was an abusive partner, so I looked it up. Turned out my boyfriend WAS an abusive partner, and if your boyfriend is treating you this way, it kinda sounds like he is one too. Don't let this guy make you feel how your feeling right now! find a guy that will appreciate you for who you are
hope this helped